There was another message I needed to share yesterday and so I did not relay a story about a letter the Bishop showed me before Ward Council. As we were going into the room for the meeting the Bishop invited me to his office and handed me a letter he had received. It was from Ralph McAffee and it was titled JACK. My kids have been gone since the 4th of June so I might be slightly emotional as I think about them and miss having them at home. Anyway, the Bishop asked me to look at it quickly and let him know if it was okay for him to share it with the Ward Council. I sat in the back of the room for Ward Council and started reading this letter. Ralph serves as the Primary Chorister and for the last year or so he has observed Jack who really struggles with sharing time as it can be a little noisy and a little, I don't want to say chaotic like it is out of control because it isn't but for a boy with autism that struggles with certain things it can be chaotic and difficult to endure. I would like to secure a copy of this letter for myself so I can include it in this blog word for word but for now I will paraphrase.
Ralph talked about being the Primary Chorister and how he has observed Jack and watched as he has had no interest in singing the songs, how he struggles to sit in the meeting and how he sometimes walks around the back of the room. He shared that through his observations he figures that Jack was a little slow and possibly had some sort of mental disorder. He talked about how overtime Jack had started singing the songs and participating more. When Jack turned twelve and became a Deacon he no longer attended sharing time but Ralph continued to watch and observe and nurture his relationship with Jack. When Jack spoke in church on mothers day (that talk is included on the blog from mothers day if you would like to read it) he talked about his autism and Ralph then obviously connected the dots with his observations. Ralph then shared an experience he had one Sunday when Jack was passing the Sacrament.
Let me start this next part by interjecting some of my own observations with Jack passing the Sacrament that bring a smile to my face and joy to my heart. I love to see him participate in this ordinance, it makes me proud as a father. I always watch as the Sacrament hymn ends and the Deacons go and line up by the Sacrament table. Jack always takes the same spot on the back row so that he can serve to the section he is assigned. As he takes his position in line he folds his arms and then he lets out a monstrous yawn as he goes to bow his head for the prayer. The yawn is not audible but very much noticeable and it makes me chuckle inside, every time.
Okay, so Ralph was sharing how on this one particular Sunday he and Sister McAffee were sitting in the section Jack passes to. He said that as Jack passed him the bread he took it and then quietly whispered "thank you". Jack smiled. Then Ralph said that something happened that he had never before experienced during the Sacrament. When Jack returned with the water he held the tray and served it from his left hand and then he leaned in and put his right arm around Ralph and gave him a hug and quietly said "That was a hug". It was a special little moment that touched hearts.
As I read that letter I was filled with gratitude for the good people in my life. Good people that make a difference in my life and in the life of my family. I am grateful for Ralph and for the good man that he is. I am sure it was frustrating for him to have this older boy in the primary up walking around and not singing when he was trying to do his calling but he just loved Jack anyway and Jack loved him back. There are times when I worry about how people will react to some of the strange things Jack sometimes does but I have learned that the large majority of people who meet Jack end up loving him.
And so I don't leave anyone wondering what happened with the letter and the Ward Council. I returned the letter to the Bishop and told him I had no problem with him sharing it. He planned to do so but we ran out of time. He did mention it and said he would share it in our next meeting. I'll look forward to hearing the story again.
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