Learning to Live Again

A few months ago I added a Garth Brooks radio station to my Pandora. I really don't consider myself a big country music fan but I enjoy some twang now and again. I have always been a Garth fan and have found that I like a lot more than just Garth. I mean I can do some Boot Scootin, some Watermelon Crawl'n, I can sing along with putting a boot in your..., maybe I should have been a cowboy or at least learned to rope and ride. I don't know how it happened but I can listen to this station for days and be perfectly content.

I was talking to a friend of mine tonight whilst waiting to step into a meeting and we were laughing about my being single and the help so many want to give. I realized that it has nearly been seven years. Wow! It has been awhile. Anyway, Andy asked me to turn on some music while he was trying to fall asleep. I turned on my Garth Pandora station and the song Learning to Live Again was first up. Every time I hear that song I think of it being my current theme song. I don't exactly mean the story portrayed in the song itself though I have been on dates where that has been present. I don't really date all that well and really haven't established any kind of deep relationship with a woman, heck, not even a shallow relationship. Honestly, the dating scene is hard because that is not my priority. Seven years ago Andy was 3 years old, Jack 5 and Natty 10. My priority has been them. Dating is time consuming and when your time is filled with other things, how do you find the time to do it?  I have met and been on dates with some wonderful women. I just haven't been in a position to make that a priority. In that seven years I've held hands with one woman and that was 6 years ago. I really haven't learned how to live again and maybe it is killing me. It certainly hasn't been easy and I do have moments of loneliness. Someday I will be ready and my kids will be ready for a time when I can put more time into dating and eventually introduce someone new into our family. Until that day my learning curve will continue to be long and sometimes lonely. I'm okay with that.