Can or Will?

I am typing for the first time with wrist braces on. My hands have been falling asleep lately and it is very painful at night. I am tossing and turning just trying to be comfortable but the pain is, well, a pain. Dave has a couple of braces and mentioned having some of the same problems so I thought I would give it a shot. Typing is quite odd but my hands aren't numb so that is good and if I can sleep I will be quite happy.

I went running this morning. I thought I had run a little further then I actually had but was happy with 2.1 miles on the open road. As I was heading towards my folks house I was facing an uphill and had walked for a bit. I was ready to run again and started with a determination to run the remaining distance. I said to myself that I could do it. After a couple of steps I said to myself I will do it. I can do it or I will do it. What a difference one little word makes psychologically. I repeated I will do it several times as I ran the remaining difference. I thought about can and will - just because we can do something it doesn't necessarily mean we will do something.

As many of us may remember there was a recent political campaign that was all about hope and change. The call often heard from this campaign was "yes we can". I think perhaps a better motto would be "yes we will". As is typical with politicians there is a lot of talk about what one can do but what actually gets done leaves us wanting.

There is an entirely different level of commitment between I can and I will. I couldn't help but think about the good old missionary commitment pattern. We used to repeat an abbreviated version that simply captured the basics. It went something like this: How do you feel? I feel. What do you think you can do? I can. Will you? I will. Isn't it a process? First recognizing that you can do something and then making a determination that you will do it? I don't know. Perhaps I have put to much into this thought. Maybe I think too much when I am out running on the open road.

I have to say a few words on my kids. They left for Alaska today. I actually did pretty well with it. They were all excited to go and I hope that they will have fun and enjoy their time with their mom. I worked late and then had to run to the store. When I got home I went through the house and looked in Natty's room and then the boys room and I was sad to find myself alone.

I don't know what I can do for them while they are away. I thought about it and figured that I can pray for them daily. I will do that. I can also make a weekly trip to the temple. I will do that. I am going to go on Thursday evenings. I figure that by making this a priority and serving the Lord there he will be quick to bless and I will seek those blessings for my children. I can pray for Rachel and I will do that. I figure that she needs strength and I need her to have strength to be able to take care of the kids while they are with her.

I guess in life there are a lot of things that we can do the only question is will we?

Parting

I spent the day with the kids and we had a pretty good time. There was cleaning, dancing, mowing, and movie going on the menu or schedule I guess. We went and saw Kung Fu Panda 2 which the kids loved. I thought it was okay but not nearly as good as the first KFP. Alas, it was not about me and I am glad that the kids had a great time.

Rachel came in about 10:45 this evening. I went and did some grocery shopping for them at that time and got a little emotional walking around Smith's. I don't know, I am a wimp I guess. Anyhow, parting with them is not an easy thing for me. This is only temporary and that is nice.

Hate to call it quits but I have been busting my hump all day and I cannot keep my eyes open any longer. I hope for Natty, Jack and Andy that this transition will be smooth and that they will be guided and protected. I will see them tomorrow before they leave. I am not really excited about parting but there isn't much I can do about it. I guess it just gives us an opportunity to have a wonderful family reunited. I will be looking forward to the 2nd of August.

Whe Am I?

Who am I really? Am I like the first son that said no I won't do it and then repented and went and did it or the second son who said I will do it and then did not? Am I a man of outward appearances whose heart is far from the Lord? I don't know. I struggle to do everything that I am supposed to do. I try everyday but I fall short in so many areas. I want to do good and I put forth effort in that regard everyday but I also know that I fail everyday and I come up short of who I want to be. Can I say that the Spirit is willing but the flesh is weak? The Gospel Doctrine lesson touched on this today and so I have pondered this some. I know the Lord knows my heart, he knows my intentions, he also knows my struggles and my failings. I am grateful for the Atonement and for what it makes possible. I recognize my great need for the Savior and I am grateful for all he has done and does for me.

I am struggling some today knowing that Rachel should get here tomorrow sometime after 9 PM. I am sad as my best friends are going to be gone for the next two months. My kids mean everything to me and I have had some tough moments today. I worry about them but I have faith that they will be okay. I gave them all blessings tonight and am grateful for that experience. At the moment they are all camped out in the living room though I am certain Andy will make his way into my bed at some point in the night. I love them.

Well, who am I really? I hope my outward appearance is a true reflection of who I am in my heart. I hope that I conduct myself in a manner that is pleasing to my Heavenly Father. I know that I can be offensive, I know that I do things that probably don't make a lot of sense to other people. I am sorry to those that I hurt or offend. Anyhow, I want to do what is right. I want to be a righteous priesthood holder. I have hope in the Savior and I trust in Him. I am a son of God and I want to live up to his expectations of me.

Sleep Has Bested Me

I played ultimate Frisbee for the first time in my life this morning. That is quite the game. Hard to believe I am 37 years old and it was the first time I had played. I must say that my performance was a wee bit disappointing as I stink at throwing a Frisbee and I had a rough time keeping hold of the thing on diving catches. It was a fun game though. Good exercise and what not. I did have a moment out there when I slid pretty hard on the grass and it jolted my back a bit. I didn't think another thing of it but them at the breakfast it started stiffening up. It was actually pretty sore and I can only pin point the above mentioned slipping.

I have been battling sleep for the last hour and a half just trying to get through this. There have been a few otter pops that went missing in that time as extreme measures were required. I had actually spell checked and hit the publish post button and my post disappeared. All that was saved was the paragraph above. I am a bit sad. Truly I lost this battle with sleep. Anyhow, I may or may not come back to this and edit it when I have a little steam in the engine. As for now, suffice to say, sleep has defeated me this evening. I am out.

Find Yourself Doing

I am without a title at the moment so I am just going to start typing some thoughts. The title will come at some point and we will add it then.

In a past post I shared thoughts relative to speaking to the Highlands Ward Relief Society one night a few years back at a homemaking or enrichment night. I shared that my topic was on the subject of keeping a daily record and using it as a means of accounting for your daily actions. I may have mentioned in that post that I sang Have I Done Any Good in the World Today to the sisters and they joined me, impromptu on the second verse. That was an awesome moment, very spiritual. Anyhow, I was thinking about that today. I want to be found doing good. In whatever endeavor I find myself involved in I want to do good. There are many things that can be done to lift others. Be it some sort of service, a kindly word, or even a smile. There is nothing more fulfilling then giving of yourself to lift someone else. I hope that I can remember those feelings often and be diligent in seeking opportunities to lift and strengthen.

I was blessed today to be able to help a friend in her yard. I thoroughly enjoyed it and am grateful she let me assist. I don't know that it made any big difference for her but I was grateful to help. That is what I am talking about, simple things, they make a difference. There is no need for a great and grand production or anything that glorifies self. No, it isn't about you. It is about forgetting yourself and doing good.

On a separate note it was the last day of school today. Hard to believe that the year has passed. Jack was using my bathroom this morning and called out: "Birds are chirping on the Last Day of School". Those are some amazing birds singing a little song for some amazing kids this morning. Just a few more days and then they will be off to Alaska. I am going to miss them terribly. I love them very much.

Another Something New

I have never really done a lot of remodeling work. I mean, we have done some house fixer upperin in our day but nothing to the extent of what we have been doing at the new building O' brick house. I am trying new things on a regular basis and it is pretty fun. Certainly I like to learn the hard way for 80% of it. I try something and then realize that this didn't quite work out but if I adjust here or there it will probably do the trick. Then there seems to be more tweaking and adjusting as I go along.

Such was the case today. I wanted to get the canopy or patio cover repair done today. It is a nightmare every time it rains - which it has quite a bit lately - because a ton of water comes through the big side door that has a ramp leading down to it. There has not been a patio cover there for who knows how long but the framing for it was mostly there. Well, that has been a fun adventure getting the framing up and then starting on the metal roof. I took the long route on a couple parts of the project but it has come together. I started laying the metal roof and noticed it was sagging quite a bit in the middle. I just didn't feel comfortable after two sections were up so we put it on hold and decided a center support beam was necessary. I rigged something up and got er done. It is all zipped in and doing great. I do have some metal that needs to be purchased, measured, cut and installed. Fun times for sure. Anyway, I think I have the roof down to a system.

Tis the last day of school tomorrow. Wow. It has gone by so quickly. The last year has really gone fast. Today marks one full year that I have been single again. Hard to believe. Now I can pursue a serious relationship. My good friend Anna Patton told me that I needed to give things a solid year before I got serious about anyone. Grateful for Anna and all the help she has given our family over the last few years. I used to mow her lawn and she used to babysit the kids. It was a good trade. I do miss Pebble Beach Drive and our great neighbors there. Anyway, last day of school. I think the kids are excited. Natty couldn't wait and so she stayed home today. Actually she was feeling ill last night and said she still wasn't well this morning. Amy got sick in the night and her 6 year streak of not puking came to a messy end. With that happening I figured it best to keep Natty. Well, she was probably perfectly okay today but I do appreciate her help with Andy today.

Well my goodness. Life is constantly offering up another something new. Whether that be in the projects that we've got going on with this building, in our family life and the lessons of parenthood, or in my own relationships, there seems to be a lesson to be taught and learned. I am certainly more equipped now to handle a patio roof then I was 12 hours ago. Live and learn - isn't that what we do in life?

A Quick Road Trip

We have needed to make a run up to Salt Lake to pick up equipment for the cafe and today was the day. We ran up to Standard Restaurant Supply and picked up an oven/proofer, a rack, a sandwich prep center, a triple sink, a griddle and a few other necessities. We spent a couple solid hours in the store with our salesman Juan. He was a neat guy. Wow. I am completely worn out and ready to crash. Good thing I am sitting in front of the computer and not behind the wheel. Sweet. I am calling it. 12:50 AM. Good night.

A Crush

Can you remember your first love interest? I can. She was my babysitter when I was around 4 to 6 years old. I think her name was Laura or Laurie Panter. I don't know her name because of my excellent 4 year old memory but because when we moved back to Carson City when I was in High School her mother was my Sunday School teacher and later my Seminary teacher. Oh what could have been. Well, not really. I do remember cuddling on the couch with her when she would babysit. We were probably listening to a little Saturday Night Fever on the 8 track. It was my favorite. She was a babe. At least, she is a babe in my early childhood memory. Oh, it was such a magical time... and now I am feeling a tad fruity.

I think it is safe to say that AndyBoyTano has a little bit of a crush of his own. There is this girl that works at his old school and he really likes her. Actually, I have seen her a few times and she is a hottie and a sweetheart so I have to hand it to Andy, he has good taste. Anyway, he tells me one day that he has this girlfriend at school and I was a little taken back. I figured it was one of the girls in his class. Not so. I asked him what her name was and he belted out "Collette" with a little bit of a grin.

Collette happens to be a good friend of the family. She played soccer with Laura in High School and has been going to Amy's and dad's Ward here for a while. Anyhow, she dropped off a little gift at the house one day. I was out front working on some furniture when she pulled up and Andy came out. He took the present and the card and opened it up. It was a little book and Andy decided right then that Collette was his girlfriend. He hasn't stopped talking about her since. I keep forgetting and manage to set myself up on a regular basis. We were getting ready for the father and sons campout and I was reviewing everyone that was going with us and as soon as I was done Andy said "And Collette". Well, this type of thing happens regularly and he is constantly talking about Collette. He is a silly kid.

Today we stopped by Andy's old school so he could see his love. She was there and invited us in. He gave her a card and gift we had put together for her birthday last week and enjoyed visiting for a few minutes. He was a little shy but did pretty well and even ended the visit with a hug. Mmmmm, wonderful. I have teased him about his little hug a few times today and he just grins nice and big. Oh to be young and in love...

Thanks much to Collette for being so sweet and kind to Andy and to Jack and Natty as well. It is so nice for them and means a lot to both them and me. They certainly miss having their mom around and miss that female attention. I do my best but it isn't the same and so I appreciate very much friends that provide some of that motherly influence in their lives. I have learned from personal experience that sometimes that attention creates little boy crushes. And so I close tonight with a little cheer. Go Andy, Go Andy, Go!

PaintBalls

This post has to do with two subjects. The first has to do with paint and the second has to do with, well, balls.

The Brick House is painted. Ahhhhh. That made for a long day but it is done. There are a few thin spots here or there. Likewise there are few thick spots here or there. That is just the way it goes sometimes. In anycase, the place looks a ton better and it is really starting to feel like it is coming along and that we are getting somewhere. Tomorrow there is some electrical to do and some cement work. It is getting closer everyday and I am quite happy with it. I do have some before pictures and some pictures of progression. One day I will post them so as to provide a bit of a visual progression. I will just say relative to paint, the sprayer is the way to go. Dave and I rolled some on Saturday and it was a real pain. In fact it required multiple coats and still had some problems. I was painting second coats this morning then pops shows up with the sprayer, unravels it, gets it powered up and covers a wall in seconds. Well, that was awesome and it worked really well all day. Pops and I were on painting duty and it was good times. Dave came in after work to help as well and it is always great working with Dave. Especially when he helps out with removing doors. The guy is amazing at that - right Dave? Anyhow, is there anything finer then seeing something change, not just change but transform? Well, I am sure there is but painting something or laying sod in a yard simply works wonders. Very happy to have that done. I will be even happier after I take a shower. I am currently caked with paint. Andy loves it as it gives him something to pick and he managed to pick himself to sleep tonight.

So, balls. I got a call from Mrs. Robb. This is Jacks 1st grade teacher who has been an amazing teacher this year. She usually calls when Jack has had a rough experience and such was the case today. Apparently Jack went and told on himself to an aid today during the field day activities. Another boy in his class did something that must have set Jack off because Jack gave him a swift kick to the balls. Well it gets better - really? Can it really get better then a swift kick to the balls? Yes it can. Not only did Jack kick him in the stones but he taunted him as well. Mrs. Robb told me she had the aid write down exactly what Jack said because she didn't want to mess it up. Here is what he said to the boy. "Now you won't be able to have kids and you will have to marry a fat woman". I know that I shouldn't laugh and I didn't on the phone with Mrs. Robb but I had a good laugh with Dave, Dad, and Amy. Oh boy. Where the heck did he come up with that? I talked to him about it tonight and he didn't have an answer to that question. Oh boy. Let that be a warning - don't mess with Jack and if you do, watch your balls. He will maim you.

Be Still and Know

I find it interesting that the Lord provides for us spiritually when we need it. There have been Sundays, and I know this is going to be hard to believe, but there have been Sundays when I have gone to Church and walked away without getting much. I know that this is probably my own fault for not being prepared enough. Some Sundays the kids are tough and I have to focus so much energy on them that I simply don't get anything out of it. I had a lot of those Sundays when I was the nursery leader in Lakeland. As I am able to attend Sunday School and Priesthood more regularly I find myself getting more from the day. The Sacrament should be the highlight of the day and I do look forward to that ordinance each week but struggle to find myself immersed in the Spirit of it as I am trying to keep my kids quiet or still. I know that this season will not last forever and so we remain faithful despite the challenges.

Again, the Lord provides for us spiritually when we need it. I am not saying that we do not have to put forth any effort or seek to have the spirit in our lives. On the contrary we must faithfully seek for the spirit in our lives and find ourselves consistently doing those things the prophets and the Lord have invited us to do. I find that in that journey of obedience there is not always an overwhelming spiritual feeling taking place in my life. There are spiritual spurts that lift and strengthen. These are like manna from heaven and I love them. Today I was able to enjoy such an experience.

Brother Graff had the lesson in Gospel Doctrine today. His lessons are always very well prepared and tend to be more of a lecture. Bro. Graff taught Seminary and Institute as his profession and is never short on additional material and commentary. It just so happens that todays lesson had some participation and one of the topics being discussed had to do with prayer. The particular discussion had to do with receiving answers to prayer and stories were shared relative to feeling the spirit in prayer and waiting on the Lord. Sometimes our prayers for something specific can take hours, days, years to be answered and regardless of the rate of the answer we must remain faithful and trust in the Lord. During this process of faith we grow in ways we otherwise would not. Well, sometimes instead of waiting on the Lord we want to hurry him along and we lose patience. This does not work. Sometimes the answers that come differ from those we seek. We must trust in the Lord. Brother Graff shared the thought that we need to remember: Be Still and Know that I am God.

Yesterday I posted a discussion about Time and how I've got none. I shared some thoughts of loneliness and other challenges. I failed to acknowledge the Lord and the many blessings that he bestows upon our family. It can be so easy to get swept up in the pace of life that we forget or fail to recognize the hand of the Lord. I just felt peace today and assurance that the Lord is aware of me and my struggles. He knows me and the desires of my heart. He knows the loneliness that I feel on occasion and he is saying to me 'Trust in me. Be still and know that I am God'. I am grateful to the Lord and I will trust in him.

Shortly after this we opened Priesthood by singing the hymn I Know That My Redeemer Lives. I love this hymn. I struggles to sing it today as I felt its message as we sang. I close tonight by sharing those words:

1. I know that my Redeemer lives.
What comfort this sweet sentence gives!
He lives, he lives, who once was dead.
He lives, my ever-living Head.
He lives to bless me with his love.
He lives to plead for me above.
He lives my hungry soul to feed.
He lives to bless in time of need.

2. He lives to grant me rich supply.
He lives to guide me with his eye.
He lives to comfort me when faint.
He lives to hear my soul’s complaint.
He lives to silence all my fears.
He lives to wipe away my tears.
He lives to calm my troubled heart.
He lives all blessings to impart.

3. He lives, my kind, wise heav’nly Friend.
He lives and loves me to the end.
He lives, and while he lives, I’ll sing.
He lives, my Prophet, Priest, and King.
He lives and grants me daily breath.
He lives, and I shall conquer death.
He lives my mansion to prepare.
He lives to bring me safely there.

4. He lives! All glory to his name!
He lives, my Savior, still the same.
Oh, sweet the joy this sentence gives:
“I know that my Redeemer lives!”
He lives! All glory to his name!
He lives, my Savior, still the same.
Oh, sweet the joy this sentence gives:
“I know that my Redeemer lives!”

Text: Samuel Medley, 1738–1799. Included in the first LDS hymnbook, 1835.

Music: Lewis D. Edwards, 1858–1921

Job 19:25

Psalm 104:33–34

Got No Time

The song No Time by The Guess Who is a classic. I am guessing on the name of the song, it could be Got No Time, it could be something completely different. Regardless, in the song the lyrics say "I've got, got, got, got not time. I've got, got, got, got no time..." Lately I have felt a little bit like that. I am running on empty and there isn't a lot of time for recharging right now. Last nights post is an example. I sat down to write that around 10:30 or so and didn't get it done until after midnight because I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer. I know, no big surprise that it took that long. It is one of my longer posts and should have taken that long.

I was up this morning, had a shower and got the kids somewhat situated with breakfast, chocolate milk and what not and then I headed into to work. I came home a while later to check on everyone and found the house trashed. I had a little lunch, made lunch for everyone else and then cleaned up some. I went back to work. I picked up some Pizza for dinner so I didn't have to cook anything tonight, served the fam, read some books with the kids, and did some additional cleaning. We then had scriptures and prayer and now my kids are in bed with the exception of Andy.

It is 10:53 PM right now and I am pretty well exhausted. I still need to run, still have more to clean, still have 4 loads of laundry from earlier in the week that need to be folded. I have a really hard time living in a mess and so I think I will have a late night.

When I was home for a bit this afternoon I was thinking about single moms that go out and get it done. They work, take care of the house and take care of kids. This life never slows down. You have to constantly be moving. It occurred to me that it isn't just single moms doing this. I am in the middle of it myself and there are plenty of other men that are having to do the same. It isn't an easy go. You are alone at the end of the day. There is no one to help with the load and the responsibility for everything falls on you and you alone. It certainly makes you appreciate the assistance received from family who help to fill the void.

Things get missed. It is hard. It is lonely. All you can do is the best that you can. I hope that my best right now is good enough. I don't have time right now for it not to be good enough and I have 3 beautiful children that are counting on me and I cannot fail them. One day I will have time but for now I got, got, got, got none of it.

Dad Days

I have some fun memories from my childhood and thought about some of them today as I had another day with Andy. He has been by my side for the last three days and thought it is great to spend time with him it is very difficult to accomplish as much as I want to and need to. Anyway, I thought about times growing up when I would go into work with dad My earliest memories are of the sky lifts. Those were cool and very high. AJ Copy Shop was good times. There was a time when pops worked in the Tri-ad building in Salt Lake. That building had a huge escalator. Great American Get-A-Ways - I remember the ponds that were there and the little duck families waddling around. Hawaii work places included the favorite in Honolulu that was in the Imperial Hotel - second floor I believe. Loved the roof on this place as it was a pool. So anyhow, it didn't really matter where we lived or what dad did, I always loved going to work with the old man. It was always a good time. I hope Andy is enjoying himself. He is a little clingy at the moment and is determined to stay with me everyday. Hope he has fond memories of the time we rebuilt the restaurant.

I have been asleep for the last hour trying to get this simple post done. Well, we will call it done at this point. Anyhow, Dad days. They were always the best even if this post isn't all that hot.

A Little of Your Drink

For as long as I can remember the old man has not been a fan of sharing his beverage. Okay, if there was just a little left he might pass the bottle and allow you to finish it but don't even think about catching a swig partway through. If somehow you do manage to pull that off just make sure he doesn't know about it. As soon as he knows there has been an infraction he will quickly lose interest in the liquid refreshment. These days Amy is always sneaking a swig and there are several occasions when the old man has somehow known. It is his 6th sense.

We (dad, Andy and I) made a run out to the dump today and cleared out a trailer full of branches, light fixtures, a sink, and a lot of bricks. It was a hefty load and the bricks included two solid concrete poured sections. It was extremely heavy. I ended up dropping the gate and dragging both of them off the back. Wow. It was raining so the dump was a tad muddy. I was soaked through when we were finally done. Well, nothing quite as fun as a dump run.

As we were driving back into town Andy says "I got unbuckled at the dump and had a little of your drink". I just started to laugh as the old man had taken several sips of his beverage since we had left the dumps. Funny, he didn't have another swig of that beverage. I guess Andy's 6th sense must be the ability to drink someones drink without them knowing. Wonder how many times he has left me a little somethin to enjoy?

It's Andy for Short

As I was helping Andy get on his shoes this morning we were having a lot of fun. He and I rolled out a little earlier than usual because we dropped Natty and Jack off at school. Oh, it was snowing and Natty had her Wax Museum thing going on today. I'm sorry, I should say I dropped Florence Nightingale off at school today along with Jack. We made a stop off at the Little Brick House after dropping Florence and Jack off and then back home so we could officially get dressed and go over to the Wax Museum.

In doing so I took the crocks off his feet so we could put on shoes and discovered that his toes were green. They quickly became his hulk toes. So we are laughing and chatting and I took some pictures of his toes (I will post them but the camera is out in the car tonight and it is far to cold and wet to go get it). Anyway, Andy told me I could call him by his second name. I asked what that was and he replied 'Are you ready Freddy'. I thought that was pretty funny because whenever I ask him that question he says 'my name isn't Freddy', usually in a somewhat irritated tone. So I said back to him 'Your name is Anderson Are You Ready Freddy Fontano?' He said yes. I asked 'what about Hulk Toes? Shouldn't your name be Anderson Are You Ready Freddy Hulk Toes Fontano?' This excited him quite a bit. We had to include his actual middle name in the mix and so we agreed on Anderson Are You Ready Freddy Hulk Toes Fontano. Well, we can't leave out Walter. Walter is Jacks middle name but Andy is pretty sure we all have Walter as a middle name so we might as well include that in his. Now we were at Anderson James Walter Are You Ready Freddy Hulk Toes Fontano. We kept it there and were quite satisfied with that moniker. Then there came the soggy foot moment and the sucking water off the parking lot incident as well as the tape on my face and chocolate skinny cow desires. Interestingly enough I think we can close the day with the official name as Anderson James Walter Are You Ready Freddy Hulk Toes Soggy Foot Sucking Water Tape On My Face Chocolate Skinny Cow I Want Chocolochy In The Red Cup I Want To Sleep In Your Bed Fontano. I think we'll just call him Andy. Until the next blog post this is John Allphin Father of Anderson James Walter Are You Ready Freddy Hulk Toes Soggy Foot Sucking Water Tape On My Face Chocolate Skinny Cow I Want Chocolochy In The Red Cup I Want To Sleep In Your Bed Fontano Fontano signing off.

Well I do need to report that Natty did a great job as Florence Nightingale and Andy and I thoroughly enjoyed the wax musuem. Andy kept them all on their toes walking around and clapping for them repeatedly. Ooohhh - we could add that to his name - Anderson James Walter Are You Ready Freddy Hulk Toes Soggy Foot Sucking Water Tape On My Face Chocolate Skinny Cow I Want Chocolochy In The Red Cup I Want To Sleep In Your Bed Clapping For Them Repeatedly Fontano. Has a certain ring to it.

Number 200

This is going to be short and sweet. There is something special about the number 200. Just take a moment and consider that figure for a time. mmmmm. So, did you come up with anything spectacular as you pondered 200? Seriously, I had absolutely nothing come to my mind. Wait, I've got it. My build is such that 200 is a pretty good weight for me. I don't mind if I eventually get back down to my RM weight in the 185 range but really can't complain about 200. Alas, this has absolutely nothing to do with the title of my post but it was the only thing that came to mind other then the bicentennial of the United States but there is nothing about today that I could really tie into that. So we will leave it at that, 200. Good number.

Tonight I was knocking on doors, tracting out an apartment complex in our Ward. President Fawson and I went out to learn about people living in some apartments in our Ward boundaries. Ben's wife Jamie also came with us as she is the RS Secretary in the ward they need to get the same info we are trying to gather. It was like being back on the mission. It was fun. We made some open invites to our Ultimate Frisbee game scheduled Saturday the 28th. Should be fun. Anyhow, it was freezing out there as we knocked doors. We had a few good visits and met a few interesting people. We did meet a newly married couple that just moved in and are planning on attending our ward. Fantastic. They have some good contacts already and are excited to come. Sweet.

I have to share a couple of thoughts of appreciation and gratitude. I noted a couple of days ago on Facebook that we had left Florida a year ago. We have missed a lot of things about Florida and many of our friends there. At the same time we have received a number of blessings here in Cedar City. I am very appreciative of family and friends who have given so willingly to help our little family. I recognize that it isn't always easy to open up your home to 3 fairly strong willed kids and for those that have done so I am so very gratefu. Ma spent last summer watching the kids each day and that was a great blessing for them. Jay and Sara have had one or all in their home several times throughout the year and have been very giving. Thank you. Amy has been here to pitch in and hold the fort for me on the occasion as had Dave and Dani. Why even grandpa has taken little boys on shopping adventures and the like. I sincerely appreciate the love and support we have had here. Tremendous.

A few hours ago I was feeling the weight some and I cannot help but feel weak and sometimes quite inadequate. Well, I thank you, each of you for the service rendered to our family.

Must close as I am falling asleep. Sure do love and appreciate my kids as well as siblings and friends who have done so much for our family.

Well, thank you all for reading and taking an interest in the blog. Oh, I almost forgot. Please take a moment to celebrate post Number 200. Cheers!

A Rough Few Minutes

We had an early Family Home Evening tonight. As dinner began to wind up I immediately launched in to FHE. We discussed work, family work to be more precise. I used a lesson I read yesterday in one of the Duties of the Priesthood books I have. We discussed everyone participating in keeping the house and taking care of thier responsibilities. I imagine there is going to need to be some follow up discussion on the matter and some training. That is okay. I've also got to get a job chart going and some visual aids. Fun stuff. Though FHE can be a living hell this was not the rough few minutes I refer to in the title. No, FHE was no more of a challenge this week then any other week. Par for the course I guess.

Anywho, after FHE we went over to the Brick House as there were a few things that I wanted to get done today still. Dave was there working on some plumbing stuff and we were having a bit of a challenge in that department. I tried to help out a bit but didn't get very far before and slammed to knuckels (one on each hand) into a pipe and cut them open. My hands, though feeling slightly better today, are still very dead and quite painful to use in certain things. I tried popping out and electrical knock out and couldn't manage it with the pain of gripping and what not. I am quite happy they are feeling better and hope they are fine in the next day or so. .

Sometimes we have experiences in life that we just wish never happened. If only there was a way to turn back the clock for just a couple of minutes we could erase the error of our ways and everything would be fine. I had been using the air compressor and nail gun tonight to put up some trim around the new doorway. I had done all that we could do and was in the process of putting the nail gun away when I heard the compressor crash and Dave ran towards it. Natty and Andy had left to walk home several minutes before the incident and Jack happened to be right there and quite captivated by the compressor. I told Jack not to play with it but how can you resist such a great contraption? You can't. I don't know how he did it but he managed to dump the compressor. It was full of air and under pressure when it went down.

The good news; no one was injured and the tank didn't blast throught any walls. The bad news; the valve busted clean off and I have no idea how I am going to fix it at this point.

Jack was pretty scared primarily because of the noise of all of that air coming out of the busted valve. The sudden loss of pressure also triggered the compressor and this only added to the noise level. Dave had gotten the tank back up. He also got the machine unplugged and the compressor off. I was a skosh miffed and Jack got to feel some of my displeasure. He was apologetic and felt bad for breaking the machine. He suggested a few times that I go buy a new one. I made it clear that I could not do it. He then went on to come up with some creative fixes to it. Sorry that I cannot recall a single one at the moment.

For whatever reason Jack became interested in the sheared piece. I asked him not to touch it. What was my surprise when I was out degreasing some light covers and heard a big bang on the glass doors. There was Jack and wouldn't you know it, he had thrown the sheared piece at the the doors. I thought I was going to lose my mind. I opened the doors and asked him what the heck he was doing. His response "I'm just all screwed up". I told him that he wasn't all screwed up but he had done a stupid thing. He then said "I'm just stupid". He is crying and a bit shaken up so I picked him up and gave him a little squeeze (he likes the impact)and told him he wasn't stupid and he wasn't screwed up. Sometimes in life we do stupid things and we make mistakes. He calmed downs a bit and I asked him if he thought he could handle the hose (redirect energy)as I needed help spraying down the light covers. He was all about it and then he decided he would like to sit in the truck. It was a bit chilly. No problem.

Well, we had a couple of quick chats where Jack told me he didn't want me to share the mistake with Natty and Andy. I told him I would not and he was very relieved. I can remember those kind of experiences myself. They are not our proudest moments and can make us want to crawl under a rock. I have been there - not under a rock but on my knees. It is all good. We will survive.

I am grateful for the Savior that, when I make a mistake he is patient.

Dead Hands

My hands are dead. I took a beating with them all week at work and they are not happy with me about it. They have been numb for the last few days and that is making use of them fairly uncomfortable. I wrote once about hands and how much I enjoy using them, even holding them. That is probably a November 2010 entry. Anyway, the simple task of buttoning a collar on a shirt was almost overwhelming. I pulled through somehow and the kids did not go naked to church.

Having dead hands makes the work a little less comfortable. We press forward because we must and because we rise and shine. I am hoping this pain will subside here soon. In the meantime we will rest well and dream of large women...

Jack and the Ladies

We got home from the Father and Sons campout and I was pretty well wiped out. I checked in at the Little Brick House later in the day and saw that things were moving forward nicely. I worked for a little bit and helped out with some texturing in the bathroom. I think it looks pretty Short. Well, after that I decided that I would take the kids to McD's for dinner and let them run around in the playland for a while. They did and they had a good time.

I looked up at one point and found a table of ladies that were under Jack's spell. It was awesome. At first he had embraced the girls arms that is opposite him at the table and to his left. He carried on a conversation with her for a while and really had her laughing. The other 3 were captivated by him has well. They were laughing and looking around. After spotting me they put two and two together. I just sat and watched as he worked the table. Snuck this little picture as well. He was great.


Nice work Jack. Fearless around the ladies. Perhaps I need to take note.

a sad note

Okay, I just typed out my blog for last night entitled 2nd left hand turn. It was a wonderful report on the father and sons activity last night and this morning. I had coordinated the written portion with pictures that I had planned to download. The entire process took me an hour. Anyhow, it didn't take and I lost the post. There is a small saved portion of a draft in my account but the meat is gone. I am a little put off at this tonight and am not going to spend more time on it now. I will find some time after meetings tomorrow to go at it again. I have an additional post for today called Jack and the Ladies but will wait on that as well. Andy is in the process of driving me nuts and I dare not spend any more time on the computer this evening. I have never enjoyed the feeling of having the wind knocked out of myself and having my entire or nearly entire post disappear is just like that. Oh well, you know what they say in the Russian Army... exactly.

2nd Left Hand Turn

(quick note - I have a few pictures to download that I have not included yet. Sorry, they will come eventually)

Something fantastic happens around the middle of the month of May every year. It is one of my favorite activities in the Priesthood and is commonly known as The Fathers and Sons Campout. My earliest memory of this happens to be a trip with my dad when we lived in Carson City. I remember a yellow Toyota pickup truck, camping on a lake and listening to Willie Nelson sing On the Road Again as we drove. I am sure there were more than one adventures with this yellow Toyota truck and I don't know if this has anything to do with the Father and Sons campout that I can remember or not but I recall stopping on the side of the road and looking at a hot air balloon and people that were going up for a ride. Perhaps the old man can clarify but in my mind this is all one big memory. I had to have been somewhere around 3 or 4 years old.

Well this weekend was Father and Sons. Because I was out in the middle of nowhere I did not write my blog last night so this is going to cover the entire camp and I will also include a second post for today.

I worked at the LBH yesterday doing some painting in the sitting area of the restaurant. It is coming along. I worked on the red walls and it is just about there. It was nice to get that pretty much done and I liked the finished look. It is an amazing difference compared to when we first started in the building.

Okay, the above was auto-saved in a draft but everything else that I reported on was lost. I am now typing in Word rather than in blogger itself because losing everything has now happened a couple of times and it is quite time consuming to get it all back down.

Regardless, we are on to our second report now of the Father and Sons activity and hope that this one will stick. I think I will go for a much simpler report this go round.
Quite simply the evening was excellent. I picked up the Gilmore boys and took them out as their dad didn’t make it to town this year and their uncle forgot about it and double booked. I had asked Heidi about it earlier in the week and got a text from her Friday morning. I was happy to help and both Miles and Ethan were great.

We got to the camp and all the boys were excited to be there. I got Miles and Ethan directed over to where we were setting up tents and gave them a quick hand with theirs. It was one of my favorite styles – the classic two pole tent, three poles if you count the rain fly. Anyway it was up and done pretty quick. I then went on to help Jay with the final touches on his tent – it is a massive cabin tent. We were bunking in with him and the boys. Andy was so excited about it he had to get inside. Jack was walking by and jumped for joy when he saw it ready to go. I got lucky with my picture taking timing.

Dinner was next and the meal was fantastic. Ken Betritch and the High Priests put on quite the meal. It really was delicious. Andy passed on the dutch oven ribs and potatoes but quite enjoyed a hot dog. Miles and Ethan hung out with Andy but Jack found his own special seat and table on the back of Ken’s truck. I sure do love Ken. He has been so wonderful to our family since we moved in and I appreciate that. We get the handshakes and winks at church and he always takes time to build me up. Anyhow, he is a good man as are many of the brethren in the Ward.

We had a little fireside with Brother Bishop on the restoration of the Priesthood. It was a good message. Most of the boys had gotten started on roasting marshmallows. Jack and Andy both gave it a go though I think they were more into just putting something in the fire. Miles and Ethan were the kings of the Marshmallows. They had brought enormous marshmallows and were the envy of all roasters. I did help carve a few sticks for roasting. Had quite the line there for a while and I think most of the boys put those sticks to use. I think some became fishing spears the next morning. It was a good time.

We had a fun evening and the boys and I went to the tent for some reading time as the sun started going down. I also needed to get them into some warmer clothes and so we hung out there for a bit. Jack wanted to stay and sleep so Andy and I went out to socialize some. Jack decided to get up and join after a while and threw his duck head boots on with his pj’s and his sweet cap. He was looking quite special. I didn’t have my camera so didn’t get a picture of him. I did take a picture of him with Miles camera as I was holding it for him at the time. I will have to ask Heidi if she can send a copy. It was a sweet get up.

I hung out and talked with Jacob Miner for a while. I love that guy. He has been a great friend since moving in to the ward and we also enjoy a South African connection. He served in Johannesburg Mission a year after I returned home. Anyhow, he brought a great light up capture the flag set up and so most of the boys and a few of us adults went and played several rounds. Andy was all about it but Jack hit the sack. I must not see very well in the dark because I was like a path of destruction out there. I managed to collide with a few boys. Mind you these were not head on collisions and truthfully the boys took me down on a couple of occasions but regardless they took a hit in the process. Non-intentional hits I must say. Everyone survived but I felt bad because of these entanglements. I also got hung up on a couple of sage brush bushes one of which got the best of me and the other that I pretty well flattened. It was a good time. Andy absolutely loved it and snuck in there for the flag a few times when he wasn’t being an iron curtain around our flag.

The next morning was good. Jay was in charge of breakfast and was up early to get moving on that. I was looking forward to a little daylight myself as is usual when I camp. So darn uncomfortable that I just want to get up and get going. The boys stayed in bed for quite a while. Well my boys did. Ethan was actually the first one up but Miles slept in quite a while. Breakfast consisted of some very tasty breakfast burritos. Jay made the same last year and they were quite excellent. Jack and Andy were not so into the burrito thing so Jay made Jack a delicious cheese quesadilla while Andy had juice for breakfast and eventually ate a plain flour tortilla burrito. It was funny as Bro. Bishop was putting up chairs and Jack managed to plop right down in the next chair on Bro. Bishops list. Jack had no idea and Bro Bishop got a kick out of it. They ended up having a good conversation and Bro Bishop told him all about his name; Willard Robin Bishop. He says there was a little Robin on the window seal when his mom named him. I am sure Jack will forever remember this story.

Well there was some exploring done. Jack liked to hang out over the water while Andy was all about collecting sticks. Miles and Ethan ventured out with a few other things to do including spear fishing and air gun shooting. Rest assured there were no animals killed or injured in the making of this blog post. We broke down camp and were back on the road before too long.

I believe everyone had an enjoyable time. It was a lot of fun even if I didn’t play Willie Nelson singing On the Road Again. I do want to report that while on the road Miles turned and talked to Jack for a bit. He told Jack how much he liked his testimonies. It was neat. Jack simply replied “Thanks”. It was great and I appreciate that thoughtfulness very much.

Looking forward to next year. I think a tent trailer will need to be the sleeping arrangement for the next go round. I can always hope. A queen size air bed anyway...

We've Got A Blogger Down

Here I sit and type tonight having failed to type my blog post. The reason is not because I am not sitting and typing but rather because blogger is handling some maintenance issues and I cannot access my account. Sweet. Hope this doesn’t happen all that often and I hope whatever maintenance exists doesn’t wipe my blog clean. That would really be quite sad.

Spent the day laboring over at the Brick House. We are progressing. Today I put the wood framing in the new door way. It was a fun little project that included me smashing my finger at one point and cutting it open. The best part was the old man being right there when it happened. Yes, he doubled over at the thought of it and may have been hurting more then I was. I wasn’t sure if he was going to pass out or not. Funny.

Today was filled with a variety of things and that was fun. I worked on the aforementioned framing of the doorway plus handled a project on the roof with the patching job. That took me to cleaning up some crap on the roof and then trimming back the neighbors trees that were laying on and rubbing a large section of the roof. It is a vinyl covered roof and I figured that tree branches were not ideal. No worries now. Did some fun drywall work in the back bathroom that is really coming together. That included a fun little measuring challenge with the old man that had me laughing. Awesome. “I think this is about the size of a 2 X 4”. Good times working with pops. I tried my hand at taping and mudding drywall in that back bathroom. I don’t know that it turned out perfect but it will do. Oh there were other things here and there and that is all good.

There is still much to do and busy days ahead. Must go get some rest now so I can be ready for a full day tomorrow that includes a Father and Sons campout with the Ward. I am looking forward to that as are Jack and Andy. I think it poses a little challenge on the blog post for tomorrow night as well but we will get something together.

Demolition Man

In the Brick House there is a wall and that wall needed to come down. Well, part of it did anyway. In order to have the 'mall' flow the way that it nees to there was need to put a passage way in a brick wall. Well, we could always continue to use the womens bathroom as a hallway but it would prove less effective and there may be one or two ladies that might get offended by that. So after having an engineer offer his opinion to the guy that was originally going to help us with the wall we faced a frightened crew. Yes there was fear that the building would come down and this has caused some delay in our progress.

Last week I met with Jason who has been helping us with some of the work and we discussed the plan he and Robert (a friend of the folks from New Harmony who is also helping with some things - his brother is the engineer) came up with. I will not relay it here as doing so will put me to sleep for sure. Suffice to say it was major overkill. I shared with Jason some of the thoughts pops and I had on the matter and he seemed to think it would work. At that precise moment I looked over at the 4 ft door on the side wall and noticed that it happend to be done the same way I had just suggested. Funny, the building was still standing and it was carrying more load then the wall we were needing to cut. I am sure this is all very interesting.

Well, today we simply made it happen. We were pretty confident that our plan would work. I had picked up needed iron for the header last week and today we took down a wall. It is a thing of beauty. As I got into it I found that much of what they were fearing didn't exist and the project was a lot simpler then it was made out to be. The iron headers worked great and the demolition of the wall was quite fun. There was a moment when I blasted through some brick with the sledge hammer and it went through a little quicker then I anticipated so I took a small chunck of flesh out of a knuckle. I had to clean it and what not but it is fine. Back to work and the demo is done. We have some supports to put in tomorrow still and a little concrete to pour but other then that, it is in there. So relieved.

Dave - personal parable time. Sometimes in life we can get so carried away by planning and analyzing that we fail or even fear to do the work. A favorite quote of mine comes from Elder F. David Stanley of the 70 - he served in the Africa Area Presidency back when I was on mission. Anyhow, he said in the April 1993 General Conference the following relative to work: "Say and sit will never replace diligently do". With this project we had a simple plan to begin with and then someone else offered to lend a hand. We thought that was a good thing. It was, and very much appreciated too. Anyhow, we kind of let go of the project and were relying on someone else who somehow blew it up to much more then it needed to be. It became some complex that it was frightening and the result was that it stalled out. We had to keep progressing and so we acted. We were uncertain what would happen today when the cutting started. There certainly was the possibility that the building would come down but until we did we would not know. And so we cut and we secured and we cut and we hammered until we accomplished what we set out to do.

You know I could insert my favorite all time poem at this point but I will not recite the entire thing. Perhaps just a line or two -

There are thousand to tell you it cannot be done.
There are thousands to prophesy failure.
There are thousands to point out to you one by one
The dangers that wait to assail you.
But just buckle right in with a bit of a grin
Just take off your coat and go to it
Just start to sing as you tackle the thing
It cannot be done, and you'll do it.

Congrats to the Graduate!

Yesterday I shared the news that my little boy swears like a sailor and today he is proving for certain that he is all grown up. Yes the little man has graduated from preschool. Mom, Amy, Jay, Sara and kids, Natty, Jack and I attended the festivities at SUU Head Start. The program was quick and simple just the way it should be. We actually spent more time sitting and waiting for the thing to start then the program actually took. Cool. This has been a great school for Andy and I know he is going to be missing it. He loved his teachers and loved being in class. We are looking forward to kindergarten in a few months and the joys that come with that. I hope he is ready for it.

In the program they performed a song the included the lyrics Red, White and Blue I love you. It was a patriotic song about our country. I liked it. They made different hand gestures throughout the song. My favorite was watching Andy flash the I love you sign. Such a character.


There was a point when he was quite relaxed and slipped his hand in his pants. Yes, that is for some reason a very relaxing place to stick your hand. Don't know why, just is. Look, if your a guy and you lay down for a little nap and simply slide your hand in the front of your britches it's just comfortable. You don't slide it down too far so that you are holding your stuff, no you just tuck your hand right inside the waist band and it is good. Again, don't know why this is the case, it just is. Anyhow, I was a tad nervous but he pulled it out and got back on track.


He sure was happy to get his certificate. Grateful for all the family support. Andy did get some cheers when his name was called though none of us were quite a boisterous as a couple of the proud fathers in the bunch. Fun times.


When we got home I knocked out some quick quesadillas for dinner (two nights in a row) and then caught Andy enjoying a little swing time. He went with me to the Brick House to work on some walls - Dave and Pops were there painting and Andy and I worked on prepping some other walls for paint. He is a good helper.


I am grateful for my kids. They are wonderful little people and bring so much joy into my life.

Catching Up

So Andy said something about the damn rain today and that simply follows a couple of other damn things that he has mentioned over the last few days. Damn, what is with his language and who taught him to talk like this? I have to completely shoulder the blame for this one.

I have shared a time or two that in South Africa Damn and Hell are not considered swear words and so I incorporated them into my regular vocabulary. Well, dammit to hell if it hasn't come back to haunt me in the colorful language of my 4 year old. So really he isn't the only one. Natty has not adopted my poor vocabulary but I'll be damned if she isn't telling everyone that I swear. I mean, where the hell does she get off? Anyway, Jack has strung together a few colorful statements on occasion. My favorites are the moments of frustration when he blurts out a dammit to frickin hell.

Oh boy. I am sure to have offended some and have opened up way to much about myself here. Mother - take it easy. You know where some of this language came from. Yes well, it is catching up to me all to quickly. Looks like I am going to have to make a few changes to my vocabulary even if it means betraying my South African ties. Who the hell am I kidding? There is no way that is happening. I know damn well as soon as I have to move the parents again the swearing will commence.

But seriously - I'd really appreciate it if you would all watch your damn language around my kids. I don't know how the hell it happens but they start repeating it.

By the way, what do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Hellifiknow.

Fontano Tacos

Right so a good strong Swiss/Italian last name like Fontano and fine Mexican cuisine don't exactly go together. Makes me think for a moment about Grandma Vi's favorite Mexican restaurant there towards the end, some of you know the one, owned by the Greek guy. Honestly, that one really kind of stunk and I have some serious questions about Grandma's taste buds the last few years. Greek Mexican food just doesn't work.

Well what gives? How can I make a case for Fontano Tacos? Simple really, come have some. They speak for themselves and oh how they speak to me. Softly, gently, lovingly calling my name. Yes they whisper sweet nothings in my ear. There was a time when we would have tacos for dinner every Sunday. I love that tradition. I have fond memories like the time we were staying at Aunt Junes cabin in Incline Village and Jay and one other brother (who I am not recalling at the moment, with my luck it will be Mike and the middle child controversy will have been stirred a bit) quietly pounded an entire pan. I cannot fail to mention the 90 year old Tabasco that we found in the pantry - it's got to be good when you get that kind of age on Tabasco.

As a missionary there was not corn tortillas in South Africa so I learned how to make my own flour tortillas and there were a few times when I made tacos for the District or Zone I was serving in. It was like a little bit of heaven. Naturally the flour tortillas were a bit different but it was close and it was delicious. I can still remember being in the middle of an Indian community in Port Elizabeth called Malabar with a Muslim Mosque across the street and a Hindu Temple down the road. There were about 8 of us that day hanging out at our place making Fontano Tacos. Just for a little historical fun, this would have been during a four month period directly surrounding the time that Nelson Mandela was elected President of South Africa. I recall also that the first meal that I wanted when I returned home was tacos and so it was. Fantastic.

I decided yesterday that we needed to have tacos today. The folks are out of town so I knew that Amy was likely on her own and I invited Dave to come over if Dani had to work. That was the case so they both came. Amy's friend Garrison also joined for the meal and I had invited my brother in law David and his wife Valerie and their kids to come over. So the house was clean and I was a little behind on my cooking schedule but Dave showed up and then Amy followed and they both pitched in and we got them done. That is perhaps one of the keys to Fontano Tacos - the team prep. It is always a good time.

Well, David and Valerie didn't make it. I thought they were coming but they also have a big drive ahead of them on their way to Kansas City. The kids were looking forward to seeing them as was I. Perhaps next time. David ran in the Ironman Triathlon in St. George yesterday. Pretty awesome.

So we had some taco's. Not quite 72 of them but we put a significant dent on the package that comes with 72 tortillas. It was a good showing. I have a solid pan left over so we will be enjoying tacos a few times this week. I am perfectly okay with that. Amy brought a jello salad which was delightful and that was the meal. Dani came after she got off work and Andy went right for the hair. His favorite thing. Yep, it was a fine, fine meal.

So I know I should pay tribute in here to mom for being such a wonderful mother. That she is. In fact she was mentioned by the speaker in our Sacrament Meeting today as Jay provided a little info to him. Patience, 6 boys that liked to fight, weekly letters as missionaries. Treasured letters that you knew were coming. Thank you mom. I should continue here with a discussion about mom teaching me how to pray, especially when it really mattered like when, I don't know, a unicorn got flushed down the toilet or something. As I make that comment I do so realizing any readers are going to think I am crazy. Yes. Actually it is a complete reference to a talk Dave heard in his ward today and was really just added as a little joke for Dave. Thanks Dave.

Again, much to be grateful for when it comes to mother. Certainly you have provided a living example of service and of love for the Lord. You have demonstrated great faith in the midst of tremendous trials. You have persevered. You have loved. You have dedicated your life to the raising of your children unto the Lord. I believe that you have done a pretty good job of that and take a moment on behalf of each of your children to say thank you and we love you.

I must take just another moment here to thank you for perhaps one of the greatest of all gifts edible, even Fontano Tacos. Mmmmm, delicious. Thanks mom.

Sleep Deprivation

I am completely exhausted right now. I didn't get a ton of sleep last night after my Vegas trip and then managed to keep myself busy all day so as not to sit down and fall asleep somewhere. Now I am sitting here typing this and I am sure it is only a matter of a few minutes and I will be completely passed out. It is 20 minutes after midnight and I am in for a rough morning because I just got Natty and Jack down and Andy is sitting beside me right now fighting it as much as possible.

I think I am going to call this one good and go to bed. I am grateful for the day and for my sweet children. Natty, Jack and Andy are wonderful. I forgot to mention in the post from yesterday my special thanks to Dave for watching the kids while I was away. I have now been passed out for at least 20 minutes and am fighting it again. In other news Andy is asleep so his fight didn't last very long. Grateful for that.

Where Do We Go Now?

A little after 1 AM I was pulling out of the Sinclair gas station in St. George. When I got onto the highway Guns N Roses Sweet Child O' Mine came on. I am sure there are many who would not approve of this classic hit but have to say it ranks on my top, we'll say 100 of all time hits. I gave that a lot of thought. There isn't much from Guns N Roses that I like but it was a triple shot weekend so they followed this song with Welcome to the Jungle. Check - like it. Finally the third song arrived and I was still awake enough to enjoy Live and Let Die. For a guy that was hanging on to consciousness with a bag of pistachios and a tasty beverage these classic rock licks were a welcome treat.

Can you believe I am giving Sinclair run time on my blog? Twice now even. Pete works for Shell and my neighbor is KB yet I give it up for Sinclair. Okay, it was the lowest priced gas at that particular exit. I didn't even see a Shell and KB is not down in Saint George. Did I mention is yesterpost that I talked to Ken and Gloria and they told me they have submitted papers to go on a mission? I was really excited to hear that and look forward to hearing about their call. Very good people.

Had a great visit to Vegas this evening. It was a quick trip down and back. I picked up a table and sewing table to restore and then went out with Karry Rathje to a very fancy dinner at the Costco snack bar. Yes we enjoyed hot dog combo's. It was all business too. We didn't browse the store at all which may actually be a sin. Anyway, hit the snack bar and since I was taking her to such a pricey establishment I didn't even hesitate to let her pick up the tab when she told me she had it. Amy had given me grief earlier in the day for my plans and I told Karry she was really going to be impressed when I told her that I let Karry pay for it too.

I have to say that it is Saturday morning and I am editing this post because the entire thing was pretty pathetic. I was totally on fumes the entire time and the things that I wrote were not making any sense. Here was part of the original post: I am asleep and this post is not going so well. I had a good visit to Vegas and made the long drive home tonight. Where do we go now? I guess that is a good title for the blog. I enjoy a little GNR but also wonder how to answer that question. Not real sure what the next move is. I guess I will have to ponder that a bit.

And here is how I finished last night - well 6 hours ago anyway: Okay, I am out. I am simply asleep here at the computer. Perhaps a little editing on the morrow will be required.

That may have been somewhat weak. I completely failed to mention that we went to the Angel Park Golf Course and played their miniature golf course. Yes 9 beautiful holes of miniature golf on well kept greens. It was a challenge and we actually played it twice - we were told that it was okay to do so. We both ended up in a sand trap at one point and I was trying to be smooth with the scoop side of the putter in retrieving the balls out of the sand trap. I failed miserably and only scooped a load of sand that ended up all over my pants and shoe's. Karry thought that was great. I lost balance a couple of times as well but fortunately did not fall. More amusement. It was a great time.

Karry is a lot of fun. She has a very busy life for sure. I don't know how to answer the question Where do we go now. I think the appropriate way to answer that is slow. We are simply friends and that is good.

Trim It

I fired up the weed whacker today in an effort to rid the brick house of some pesky weeds that have been slow to kill over from the poison I put on them. Turns out I just about destroyed my shins. I had small unmanned islands flying up and nailing my legs to the point that I had to stop. I am going to need to get some knee high rubber boots. Ouch. It was a bit of a beating.

The line also ran out on my trimmer so there wasn't much I could do anyway. I purchased some new line tonight as well as some sanding sponge blocks from HD. I forgot to pick up the rubber boots but will run by the folks house on the morrow for those. Anyhow, I decided to give the yard it's first go round for the year. It looks pretty dang good. I quite enjoy yard work. There is just something about it that speaks peace to my soul.

I hate to trim this one short but I can't keep my eyes open. I have a little boy that fell asleep after his field trip today and he is a live wire tonight. Feel free to pass out at any moment - no really it is okay.

Mr. Hairy Toe

Amy was over tonight to trim Natty's bangs and to give me a hair cut. I say over tonight like she doesnt even live here. She is housesitting for the folks this week and she managed to make it home tonight for a couple of trims. Note that there was not any waxing of the back after the big hint in yesterdays post. What gives? Anyhow Andy was determined that rather than go to bed he was going to sit at the dining table and watch. Before the trimming began he put his foot on my leg so that he could help hold the cape on. I called him Mr. Hairy Toe and he let out this freakish laugh. It was pretty funny. I told him if he left his foot there he would get hair on it. He promptly removed his foot. We continued to converse during the trim and he mentioned that he had multiple names. I asked what one of them was, he thought for a moment and then said "haircut, at the end". Sweet. Anderson James Fontano Haircut. That is quite the name. He did clarify that he has two names; Anderson and Andy. He is certainly a character. He has a field trip tomorrow. The class is going to visit South Elementary School to check out the Kindergarten. I am glad that South was the school of choice as it will be the one he attends. I am sure he will have fun.

Things are moving at the Little Brick House II. I don't know what we are calling the new building so LBH II seems to work for the time being. We textured walls today, cleaned up some of the parking lot, met with the sign guy, scraped some crap off a brick wall, played with the floor a skosh and a few other things to be sure. Great to have the walls textured. I am trying for some painting tomorrow but we will see what happen.

I am sufficiently exhausted right at the moment so I am going to close it up. Until tomorrow evening

Half Horse

Timmy was a wee little pony that loved to play in the pasture with the full size horses... I am sure this is along the lines of what you would expect from a post entitled "Half Horse". However this is not a story about a wee little horse rather it is a tale of a young lad who was so impressed by his fathers brut strength that he referred to him as being half horse. Perhaps the identity came from occasional horse rides around the living room or a well timed horse like laugh. Actually I don't think any of these had anything to do with the label the lad placed on his father. No, the title came when the boy stuck his hand up his fathers shirt and rubbed his back. There was hair there. Yes hair, hair like you would find on the back of a horse. And so a connection was made that the father must be half horse to have hair like that on his back.

Amy - I need a wax job! Remember all our talk about you being Hitch and me being Albert? Well, in the movie Albert has his back waxed. It is time. When my son tells me I am half horse the hairy back has gone too far. Any guesses which son it might be? Yes, sweet Jack. The boy who loves to say it as he sees it. No filter. He stuck his arm through my shirt sleeve and moved it up and down my back for a minute then offered his assessment of the situation. Doesn't that just make you feel good?

It is a good thing I am only half a horse because a full sized horse would not have been able to crawl through the attic like I did today. I finished installing the can lights in the dining area and after wiring it all up I was happy to see that everything worked. Glad I didn't have to go back and trace any wires on that project. A full horse would probably have had a problem there but not me. Nooo, a half horse has skills like that.

So the carpet glue has been a bear. It has kicked my butt. I finally decided to pull it up on google last night and found some interesting things. First, we decided to incorporate the remaining glue into the new floor and simply seal it. I have read some things that say sealer wont stick to the glue. That creates a problem. Also found the secret to glue removal. It is as simple as boiling water and some scraping action. I dumped some boiling water on the floor. After some scraping I hooked up a wire brush to the drill and that seemed to work very well. I will be testing more tomorrow. I hope I can pull it off and get these floors cleaned. I don't want to go to all the trouble only to have the floors not seal and become a problem. Back at it tomorrow.

Natty and the activity days girls in her class - Mack and Ashley - were back over at the house today to finish up their boxes. They did good. I hope they like their boxes and get some use out of them. It was a fun project.

One last thing... A horse is a horse of course of course and no one can talk to a horse of course, unless of course the horse of course is the famous Mr. Ed.

Looking to Move

I started off the day by gathering up the dirty laundry, sorting it and getting it started. Looks likes four loads is going to do it for this week. That is good. Speaking of which I need to go and put the last load in the dryer. I should probably do laundry a little different and try to keep up with it daily but alas that is not something I am very good at. Besides I like to bleach my whites and when it is done daily there isnt enough clothes to really seperate out colors. Perhaps the once a week plan that I have been following will suffice. Sweet. With laundry on the go I spent the morning at home and took care of some business here including a little father and son play time with Andy. The boy is a character for sure. We enjoy our mornings together when we have them. He is my little sleeping buddy still and I would say 9 times out of 10 he is in my bed during the night.

After dropping Andy off at school I made a stop at Home Depot and then Wal Mart and finally went and took a tour of the Cranes house. They are renting from a guy named Fred and they will be moving at the end of June. They happen to live next door to Jay and Sara and their house is a little more up to date than mine. It looks like we are going to make a move one street over - why not, it isn't like I didn't grow up doing this sort of thing. Anyway, the rent is less, the home is more efficient, the decor is much nicer and the yard will be much easier to take care of. Not that the yard is a big winner for me as I enjoy the yard work. There just won't be as much to do though I have already spotted the lilac bushes in the back yard that could use some thinning out. Truly one of my all time favorite things to do - seriously. The other benefit here is being next to Jay and Sara and having their help with the kids when I am working. Andy is slated for afternoon kindergarten and could spend his mornings with Sara before school. The kids can come home after school and can check in with Sara as well. The street is also a little less busy with traffic and has a lot more kids on it. It will be a good location for us. I probably didn't mention the ping pong table next door but that is definitely a plus not to mention the competition.

I took out some lights and cut holes for can lights at the Brick House today. Had to alter the plan for the can lights as there happened to be a 2 X 4 right in the way of every location we were originally planning. That is okay though as I think the adjustment will look great and will spread the light to areas that were a little darker anyway. I'll install those lights tomorrow and work on some additional removal of other lights. What I removed today revealed some damage to the ceiling that was previoulsy unknown. It really wasn't too surprising though. I've got to get a hold of the guys that have been working there and get a plan together for a couple of projects. Want to get the walls textured this week as well as the hole cut in the wall. Fun, fun fun. I do enjoy seeing it come together.

If I hurry and close I might actually make it through this post without my customary nap. Yes it is true I often rest my fingers and my eyes for a bit. Cant help it. I am running on fumes at this time of night and usually still have more to accomplish as soon as I conclude my post. Such is the case tonight with laundry to fold. I can hardly wait. And with that, I close.

Passing Notes and Off Roading

Jack woke me up about 4:45 this morning because his ankles hurt. He was crying and needed to have them iced. I got my favorite bag of frozen edimame and we iced and rubbed ankles for a few minutes. He was camping out on his floor last night so we got him back up on his bed and I put a pillow under his feet. Shortly after that he was back out.

I went back to bed at that point but I couldn't sleep. After laying there for a time I remembered that Natalie had put a special note on my bed that I was supposed to read but forgot about it when I went in to bed. I sat up, turned on the lamp and read her note. It was kind of difficult to make out because she wrote it in a yellow highlighter and at 5 something in the morning my eyes were not quite ready. Anyhow it was a sweet little note and I felt very much compelled that I needed to write her back and so I got out pen and paper and wrote her a note.

As many of you know I am a bit of a boob when it comes to certain things and writing a special note to Natalie in the wee hours of the morning happened to be one of those times. And so I wept a bit as I wrote some personal thoughts and feeling to sweet Natty. I finished and tucked the note under her door and then went back to bed. I lay there with gratitude in my heart for the reminder of the note that really needed to be read and answered. To me it was a tender mercy moment and I am very grateful not to have missed it. The notes meant a lot to both Natty and myself. She has already written another back and is waiting on my to write again. Anyway there were a flood of thoughts that came to mind and instead of my usual sleep anywhere at anytime ability I was wide awake. I thought about my struggles as a parent and the things that I fail in regularly. I thought about the little things that I am unable to do for my kids right now and I am sad for them. My thoughts turned to the end of this month and that they will be leaving for two months. I wept much. It is a hard thing for me to ponder and I struggle with the thought of them going. My kids have been my best friends for years and the thought of them going makes me weep even at this moment. I remember having to go away on business trips and not wanting to leave them. It is just a hard thing. And so I count down 30 days and I fear for the time they will be away. I don't know what to expect for them. I don't know what Alaska will hold for them. I hope for the best and must trust in the Lord that he will protect them. I guess all I can do is send them forth with faith and perhaps a Priesthood blessing and then keep a prayer in my heart. And so it is that I struggle today with the thoughts of tomorrow. I know that they are excited to see their mom and to spend more time with her. I hope it will go well. Jack said to me yesterday morning before we went to work that he is going to miss me when he goes to Alaska and he started to cry. My heart just ached and so we had a hug and I told him how much I loved him.

Well I should report on Fast and Testimony meeting today. Jack got up to share his testimony and when he got to the podium and looked out at the congregation he brought his finger up to his mouth and said "shhhh, I don't know what to say yet". It was pretty funny. The when he knew what he was going to say he went on to share his testimony and talked about it being May and that May will be a great month. There was a little more to it then that but basically that was it. I think that some people in the Ward look forward to hearing what he has to say. Todd Allen (Secretary in the EQP) told me how much he enjoys Jack's testimonies. He and his wife were subbing in Primary today and he was hoping Jack would be in his class. Not so but that is okay. Ken Betritch stopped me in the hall and said "Jack gets it". He talked about how much he enjoyed the testimony and that the boys did a great job. Andy also got up and the Bishop gave him an assist again. I suppose I should get up with him but I didn't even realize he had snuck up there until he was on his way to the podium.

Tonight the kids were wanting to go on a walk and it wasn't 30 seconds out the front door that they decided they wanted to go on a drive instead. It was a bit chilly in Cedar today. We went for a little bit of a drive down the road past the Home Depot. That eventually lead to a little dirt road and before you knew it we were climbing a little mountain in four wheel drive. The kids were loving it. We made it up to the top of a little range there to the West of I15 just south of Cedar. It was a little bumpy here and there and the kids all loved it. Off-roading happens to be one of my favorite things to do though I have not done it in years. We got back down the mountain and there was a little area that we had driven around for a bit before we went up and we went back to it. In it was a little steep hill and we had only gone up it previously. I decided we would go down it. The kids were a little nervous but we went slow and I stopped the truck on the down hill. They were all three hanging in their seat belts butts in the air. The angle was at least 45 degrees if not more. Anyway they laughed and laughed and naturally wanted to do it again. On the way out Natty asked me to do a donut and I declined but Jack asked what a donut was so I had to show him. It was just a quickie and really just a half donut but they were so excited it was great. There was sufficient laughing and giggling about that to last the drive home - well I threw in a couple of introductory fishtails just for fun and that helped with the laughter. I don't know that off-roading is necessarily the greatest Sabbath day activity but quality family time is and we certainly had a lot of fun together on this quick outing.

Well I have rambled through a few thoughts there and some fun things. I used to close every journal entry expressing my love for my children and really have not done that when I converted to the blog. I do love them very much. They are my life. There isn't a lot that is more important, certainly nothing that the world has to offer could ever replace what they mean to me. I love them and am ever grateful for them in my life. I am grateful to the Lord for trusting them to my care.