Some Things

Some things don't make there way into this record of my life.  Some things just remain private and quiet.  Perhaps it is this format in which I chose to record and share that causes such reservations.  As a single parent of 3 children there are obviously some things from my past that are unknown to some and there are certain things that I don't care to air on here.  I say this only because I have a little boy who just told me that his mind is broken.  He said that right after telling me that he loves me as much as he loves his mother.  That is a bit of a heart breaker.  I think we went through a period of great loss when suddenly mom was no longer in the home and I think we have gone out and done the best we could do and we do the best we can today.  Natty was 10, Jack 5 and Andy was 3 when this happened.  I know how painful things were for me and I knew that things were painful for my children.  I hoped they would be unaffected but how could they?  I know the kids miss there mom and they enjoy spending time with her.   It isn't all that often, 10 weeks out of the year I guess.  Andy always takes that separation hard and struggles for a while after having time together.  It makes him sad.  And so it has been a tough week for him and I get to endure some nastiness and some mean things but we make it through.  I feel for him though and I hurt because I know he hurts inside, his mind is broken.  What does one do to make that better?  I don't know.  Just love him and be there for him, every day.  Well, some things are tougher than other things and some things are worth every ounce of love that we can give them.