Not All the Comfy

Any faithful readers out there who have felt my discomfort with blind dates and things of that nature?  Did you read yesterdays post about lines?  So the phone rang today, well it did a few times, one of those times I picked it up and noticed a name on the caller ID.  It was the gal from yesterday that invited me to have a seat and share my story.  Ever get that sinking feeling like "if I answer this call something uncomfortable is going to happen"?  Yeah, that feeling.  Well, there I was debating whether to answer it or pass it off to someone else.  I answered the call.   Sure enough it was the gal and basically she asked me out on a date.  This does not happen to me.  This is not in my comfort zone.  This is way outside the lines.  I am private, I am quiet, I am busy with my family.  Don't go putting me on the spot - I choke under pressure especially when it involves stepping outside of my comfort zone with ladies.  I did not answer, told her I would give it some thought and then went on to face the consequences as Dave, Amy, Shelly, Tara and Ma got on me about how I need to just go on the date.  So now I've gotta get back to her and say I'll go.  Do I want to go?  No, I don't.  Should I go?  Yes I should.  And now I owe the swear jar another quarter.  Damn! 

What Lines?

Don't we all have lines?  You know, boundaries that we do not cross.  What do you do when someone crosses that line?  I really don't know myself.  I had such an experience today and I don't really know how to feel about it. 

When it comes to the ladies I maintain a safe distance.  Probably a defense mechanism and something I do just to protect my fragile heart.  I don't know.  Anyhow, I am a private kind of a guy.  I don't like airing out my laundry or sharing too much about myself.  I also don't seek this information from others especially people I barely know.  I'm sure this is a recipe for loneliness through the balance of my life but it is where I am at today.  It is a line that I don't cross and rarely approach. 

So there is this customer, she is somewhat of a regular and she quite likes the place.  She and a friend came in for her birthday a few weeks ago and we sang happy birthday to her.  When I asked her for her name prior to singing the song she said it was really cute girl.  Her friend gave us her actual name but she requested that we use it as well.  We did.  She has been back a couple of times and today she was in again.  Long story short I was out wiping down tables and she called me by name and invited me to come share a booth with her and tell her my story.  Not wanting to be rude I sat down with them but not in the booth,  I grabbed a chair from another table and flipped it around.  Gotta keep my distance. 

Well we had an intersting conversation and I was happy to have it end.  Of course I then ended up getting harrassed by Amy and Dave for the rest of the day.  So much fun.  And that is why there are lines that simply should not be crossed.    

The Nat

Tonight we went to New Beginnings for the Young Women.  We were invited, or I should say Natty was invited because she turns 12 this year.  Made some arrangements and the boys went and hung out with Grandpa while Natty and I went to the program.  We invited Grandma and Amy and they were both able to make it.  It was a good program and we are certainly looking forward to next month when she turns 12.  Natty is excited as am I. 

I have actually been thinking about this move to young women a lot for the last couple of weeks.  I was nervous at first for Natty but that nervousness has turned into excitement as well as humble gratitude.  As I have pondered things I have really developed a great love for the Young Women program.  I have recognized the great YW leadership that we have in the ward.  I don't know what other parents think as their child reaches the age of 12 and begin their journey as a youth in the church.  Personally I feel tremendous gratitude for the program. I have gratitude for the the love that Natty has been shown thus far and I have a tremendous hope for her as she gets involved.  I suddenly began paying attention to who the Young Women leaders are and have been impressed.  Truly I am excited for Natty.

Gratitude for the program.  As a single parent it is so very difficult to meet the needs of my children.  I work hard and try my very best but I know that I am missing things.  I am struggling and I am saddened when I consider the things that I lack and am unable to provide for Natty.  I am not looking at this as a parent replacement because that it is not.  I do however long for Natty to have positive female role models in her life each day that are teaching her and leading her in righteousness.  I am looking forward to Natty developing a relationship with the Young Women who are positive role models for her and being accepted into the program. 

In the program tonight they showed a talk by President Uchtdorf about Happily Ever After.  It was a masterful talk.  I was moved often by it.  I was moved by the other messages.  It was a tough evening for me and I fought back the tears on more then one occasion.  I am so happy for this and excited for Natty to get started. Sure do love this sweet girl. 

Scenic Sick

We had a great morning in Vegas with Jim, Clo and family.  We took a trip over to a park they refer to as Dinosaur Park.  It is a nature discovery park or something like that.  Complete with a pond, ducks, geese, pigeons, turtles and other birds.  There is a great playground with some serious slides and a large sandbox that I assume is filled with dinosaur fossils.  Anyhow, the kids had a great time. 

Jack nearly lost his shoe when he was running by the pond when we first got there.  He suddenly tripped, his shoe flew off his food and right to the the pond.  He also had a couple of knobby headed geese that he played around with some.  That was funny. 

We ran up to the Temple so the kids could take a peak.  Andy was knocked out so Natty and Jack and I took a look.  I snapped a couple of pics and will post them.  It is a great place to be. 

A quick trip to a bathroom was needed for Jack and so we ran down to a store on Lake Mead and Hollywood.  It was here that I made a terrible decision.  I decided that it would be great to go the back route and show the kids Lake Mead.  We would come out at Overton/Logandale and continue on from there.  Well, that road is not a lot of fun and it adds a ton of time to the trip.  Natty was car sick and, not sure how the boys were.  It took for ever.  Any way, the scenic route made us sick and we were quite happy to get back on to the I15.  It had been nearly 14 years since the last time I had been on that road and clearly  I did not remember it very well. 

It was good to get home to Cedar.  We will be heading down again in a month and will spend a couple of days this time.  The kids are excited about that trip already.  Definitely no scenic routes on that trip. 

Records

We are in Vegas tonight.  Came down to go on a date and brought the kids.  They had fun with there cousins tonight.  It is a good set up and I know my kids love it.

We had a record setting day at work.  First was our busiest hour.  It was crazy for lunch.  Total sales was another record day.  This really has been our best week thus far.

I am passing out so am going to go.  More tomorrow and new records that need to be broken.

Running Andy

How do you know if you are one of those over protective parents?  I really don't think that I am and yet every morning I walk Andy to school.  It's not that I am afraid to let him go on his own, we've just walked over together every morning.  I have tried to let him do most of it on his own and simply shadow him.  There are some days that he is interested in that and then there are days that he is not.  Yesterday he was all about doing it by himself and not having me come.  This morning I asked if he was ready to go by himself and apparently he forgot about it.  So off we went.

I get a kick out of him.  He is a funny little guy and like many 5 year olds his backpack is nearly as big as he is.  Today he was wearing his little converse with the flames on them.  Such a stud.  He must have been feeling it because he set off running.  I was behind him keeping up and watched his little body go.  It was great.  Every now and again he would get a little burst of speed.  Sometimes these simple little things have such an impact and lead me to ponder just how much I love little Andy as well as Natty and Jack. 

We were fast approaching the school when suddenly Andy tripped and took a dive.  I helped him up and dusted him off.  He was upset because running made him trip and he wanted to go home.  I asked him if he knew what people do when they get bucked off a horse.  He had no idea.  'Well, they get right back on.  Sometimes in life we may fall down but we need to get back up and start running again.'  Then I asked if he thought he could run again and apparently my pep talk did the trick cause he took off. 

Isn't that true?  We all face challenges in life.  We all have struggles and challenges that can leave us broken and in pain.  There may be times when we think all is lost.  I can assure you that it isn't.  In my darkest hours I was not alone and though there were many times when I thought it would be easier to stay down, great blessing were realized when I got back up and kept moving. 

Perhaps the Lord watches as we press forward in life - as we run with a sudden burst of speed while wearing oversized backpacks.  I'm sure he watches with joy in his heart.  I know that when we fall He is there to encourage us to get up and go again.     

Good People

I am surrounded by good people.  I know many good people and I am grateful for the influence they've had and have on my life.  I would start with family and my parents who love the Lord and have taught their children the gospel.  I am grateful for their examples of selfless service.  It is wonderful to have their friends come into the shop and see the love that exists between them.  It is real.  I was certainly born of good people. 

One of the great things about what we do is that everyday we meet good people.  There are a lot of them.  It is a wonderful thing.  With all that is going on in the world it is rather refreshing to see and feel the goodness in people.  We do our best to provide a warm and friendly atmosphere and I hope people feel that when they come to our place.  Not only that but when I meet someone or in my own associations I hope that I am being the type of person I need to be.  What is my influence on those I meet?  I certainly hope it is good. 

Again I am grateful for good people in my life.  Grateful for their influence upon me and their examples of righteousness. 

 

I'll have the Roast Beef...

The customer is always right, right?   Well not always but how do you tactfully tell them that?  I don't know.  I am somewhat familiar with the menu at The Little Brick House.  Maybe only slightly familiar.  I am also pretty good at that register and have a lot of face time with the customers.  I enjoy it.  I like to talk to them, help them, and do my best to ensure they have a great experience.  I think we all try our best to ensure that each patrons experience is a great one. 

I was stumped today and not sure how to proceed when I had a customer, you know, the people that are always right, so this customer who I have helped a few times approached the counter and said "I'll have the roast beef sandwich".  Problem:  We do not have a roast beef sandwich.  We've never had a roast beef sandwich.  But wait, the customer is always right... sorry, no.  I suggested that maybe she was thinking about the Philly Steak.  "No, every time I come here I get the roast beef sandwich".   In my mind I was trying to figure this out and thought maybe she is mistaking the pastrami for roast beef.  Perish the thought, I offended her at the suggestion.  She looked at me like I was some sort of fool that didn't know what the heck I was talking about and in frustration picked a different sandwich.  I think she ordered a chicken salad sandwich. 

I am certain that my work related blog posts are oh so interesting.  Sorry to bore you but this is life for me and as exciting as it may not be it is what I thought about.  I felt bad for this lady.  I mean she was convinced.  I had no chance.  What do you do?  "No mam you are crazy, we've never had a roast beef sandwich".  You can't do that.  At the same time I can't just make a roast beef sandwich appear out of no where.  Thankfully though she didn't put up much more of a fight.  I told Dave and Amy about it later and then I thought maybe it was our pulled pork sandwich that she got and simply confused the pulled pork with like a pulled pot roast.  Who knows?  She did leave a tip though I wonder if perhaps she was just having mercy on this poor fellow who works the register and doesn't even know the menu or if I somehow managed to keep her happy despite the confusion.  I like to think that maybe I did okay.

Perhaps a little experiment is in order.  I may begin going places and ordering random things that don't appear on the menu.  Then I will say I have purchased them every other time I have been there and I will act very disappointed.  It could be fun to put someone on that same hot seat and see how they react.  I might even take some notes.  So how bout it?   I'll have the roast beef.  

What?

I am sitting here tonight without a thought in my head wondering what I am going to write about.  I suppose I could mention how crazy the lunch rush was today or the fact that it snowed this evening.  Perhaps I should talk about our trip to the aquatic center tonight or the lady I met that makes artisan breads.  Maybe I should share a little something about that Tilapia I had for lunch - grilled with lime and garlic, quite delicious actually.  Lots going on and the day just doesn't seem to slow down.  I really hoped to pass on the aquatic center but the kids wanted to go... Natty really wanted to go and so we went.  Unfortunately for Andy the slide was closed for the night.  So sad. 

Anyway, I am grateful to be busy.  That is a good thing.  It certainly keeps life interesting.  I am grateful for my sweet kids.  They are wonderful. 

Courage

I was assigned the lesson for the Fonty Family Cedar City Chapter Sunday Evening Meal tonight.  I was also assigned bread and a bag of Costco rolls made light work of that assignment.  Not that I was able to eat any of those rolls.  Anyhow, I got on LDS.org and took a gander at the message from President Monson for this month and decided to spend a little time on one portion of his talk.  Some may recall that he discussed or shared his ABC's for living an abundant life.  It is a great talk, the ABC's standing for Attitude, Belief, and Courage.  We spent a little time on Courage.

There were some things that he said there about courage that moved me.  When all hell breaks loose in your life and you want to give up it takes courage to keep going, to keep trying, to remain faithful.  It takes courage to trust that the Lord will not leave you comfortless, that he knows who you are and that he will deliver you.  I can tell you that the adversary works extremely hard to discourage you, to lead down a path you do not want to go.  He knows your weaknesses and he attacks.  There were times when the picture painted by the adversary were so much more attractive but I have a testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ.  I have a testimony of a living prophet on the earth and of the Book of Mormon.  I know that the Church is true.  It is that testimony that strengthened my faith, that gave me courage to continue no matter what.

Here are the thoughts President Monson shared on courage:

Face Challenges with Courage

C is for courage. Courage becomes a worthwhile and meaningful virtue when it is regarded not so much as a willingness to die manfully but as a determination to live decently.

Said the American essayist and poet Ralph Waldo Emerson: “Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide on, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe that your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires some of the same courage that a soldier needs. Peace has its victories, but it takes brave men and women to win them.”

There will be times when you will be frightened and discouraged. You may feel that you are defeated. The odds of obtaining victory may appear overwhelming. At times you may feel like David trying to fight Goliath. But remember—David did win!

Courage is required to make an initial thrust toward one’s coveted goal, but even greater courage is called for when one stumbles and must make a second effort to achieve.

Have the determination to make the effort, the single-mindedness to work toward a worthy goal, and the courage not only to face the challenges that inevitably come but also to make a second effort, should such be required. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says, “I’ll try again tomorrow.”

I am grateful for the Prophet.  I am grateful for this message and find strength in it.  When the days are long and difficult sometimes it is that hope for tomorrow and that attitude, the "I'll try again tomorrow" attitude, that give you the courage to carry on. 

Hurricane Excursion

There were some ladies in the restaurant Thursday that had come up from Hurricane and requested that we open a location down there.  They said they really needed a place like ours as they don't have any good places to eat.  I mentioned to them that we were considering a second location in the St. George area but had not discussed Hurricane.  They said they would drive to St. George to come to our place but then mentioned that St. George already has a ton of sandwich shops.  That is a good point.  I thought about it a bit and figured we should take a drive down to Hurricane. 

Before leaving we had a casual start to the day except that both Andy and Jack were up and rearin to go early.  Why?  What is it about kids that they do not get up on their own on a Sunday morning when you have 9 o'clock church but they can be up earlier then normal on a Saturday - the only day that you can actually sleep in?  I don't know the answer to this.  Well I did want any responsible parent would do, I got up, turned on model train and hot wheel videos on the computers and went back to bed.  They enjoyed themselves and I got a little more sleep.  Actually I needed it.  The last two nights I've sat down to write the blog post and simply passed out.  I've woken up with my head on the computer table and then tried to get a couple of thoughts down.  Rough.  Thought about going back and redoing them but have decided to leave them as is.

Anyhow, we took off for Hurricane around 3 actually.  We had a storm blowin in and so it was a little nasty for a bit.  It wasn't bad after we cleared Mountain Springs, still rainy and wet but no snow.  We drove through Toquerville and Laverkin and then made our way into Hurricane.  I found a few locations and saw a couple of things that could work.  I don't know, lots to think about and deal with.  Obviously a lot of financial investment as well and we are not in a position for that at the moment so anything we do would take some time to put together.  The ladies were right though, there are not a lot of places there. 

The kids enjoyed the trip.  We didn't do anything spectacular but they liked seeing the area and being on the road.  We made a stop at Costco - I mean how could I not?  I love that place and the kids love the Pizza so we ate.  I had a dog combo, no bun, mustard, sauerkraut and onions mixed.  It wasn't bad though the dog probably had a few more calories then a chicken breast.  We then did a little shopping and enjoyed walking through the store. 

It was a fun time together and that is what really matters anyway.  Not so much what we did but that we did something together.  Sure do love these kids.  They are wonderful.    

Relax

I need to relax.  Little Andy has been on one today and has not been very kind or respectful and that is hard to deal with.  A pain in the booty would be a fitting description.  My patience isn't exactly high right now and so I becomes a bit agitated.  I have tried hard to be patient but have to say it is wearing thin. 

So yes, need to relax, put the feet up, and enjoy a tasty beverage - if watered down lemonade can be enjoyed.

 

According To Who?

I was taking out the trash this morning and picked up the weekly paper.  I am not a regular reader of the paper but decided to take a look today - every now and again I get crazy like that.  Anyway, I was flipping through and saw an ad for a competitor.  This is actually a business that opened after we started The Little Brick House.  I have not heard a lot of good things about them and I am really not worried about them.  In any case I saw their ad and decided to take a closer look.  I was stunned at the sandwiches they were listing, it was like they came in and copied our menu.  I guess we should be flattered but I am not.  Then I read "the best Philly cheese steak in southern Utah".  Wow, really?  I was a bit amazed at the claim.  I believe I had the same reaction when I saw a different competitor saying they had the best grilled Reuben.  The best ______ , according to who? 

Anyone can claim their product as being the best.  That is an easy thing to say and try to claim.  Reality is a lot different.  The food will actually speak for itself.

Just the FAX

Tonight the Little Brick House hosted the Parent Training Meeting for South Elementary.  I am so glad that we can do that for them.  It is a good thing.  I am a bit sad that more people don't come but I don't exactly know how many they invite.  The information is good and though I don't manage to integrate everything I learn there into my life I do come away with ideas and strategies that help me to do a better job.  I am grateful for that.

The subject tonight was something they called FAX.  I didn't have anything to write with and authors names are not something I memorize so unfortunately I cannot report who the source is for this.  Anyway FAX stands for Feelings, Ask, Examine.  The concept behind this reminds me of the lessons on Ego States that President Armstrong taught us in the mission field.  I am sure this is not solely intended for communication between parent and child.  It could certainly be useful in any relationship.  Anyway, here are the basics.

F - Feelings.  Recognize that people have feelings.  There is some form of emotional involvement in a situation and it is important to take your feelings and your emotion out of the equation and try to understand the other persons feelings.  Just thinking here that this formula is probably intended for or best suited for conflict resolution.  Anyhow, the key is to recognize the feelings of someone and take a very logical approach to the situation. 

A - Ask questions.  In your logical approach and while trying to understand an others feelings it is important to ask questions.  You want to have an understanding of the situation and gain that through asking effective questions that gets the individual talking.  You do not to be overly aggressive with your questions because the other individual will feel like they are being attacked and will shut down. 

X - eXamine.  When you understand the feelings and the cause I guess of those feelings, you want to help the individual examine some solutions.  Brainstorming is a big part of this and once a list of possible solutions is compiled you then need to examine each one and determine the best course of action. 

Okay so that is the basics and those are my mental notes.  I did start to use the ideas tonight with all three kids fighting over the couch at scripture time.  I asked about feelings and how certain things made them feel.  I am too tired to get into the details.  Suffice to say I think it was effective.

Being A Part

I do hope that this title is clear - not referencing being apart from someone but rather being a part of something.  In this case I am referencing the community.  With the nature of what we do we have the opportunity to meet a lot of people.  We have the ability to provide them with service, good service.  I think it goes a long way and has allowed us to make a lot of new friends.  That is one thing that I think is neat about The Little Brick House, our repeat business is phenomenal because we work hard to make sure the experience in memorable.  I would suggest that the book Raving Fans has a little something to do with our philosophy and helps us to remember just how important it is to create an amazing experience for people.  I know that we do not succeed 100% of the time and so we have work to do but we try very hard.  I love it when new customers come in and we get to chatting.  Our table numbers always make them smile and then they get a taste of the food and are wowed.  That's about the time I really like to go and say hello, find out how everything is going and then deliver a little sample of fudge.  Typically the customers eyes get big when they see that fudge.  It is great. 

Today there were a couple of ladies in for the first time.  They had just learned about us and decided to come in.  They loved it.  When I checked in with them they were loving it.  We had a great visit there and they are anxious to come back, with friends.  I love that. 

I had some other folks come in that are wonderful.  I usually help them but was working on another project when they ordered.  Amy did a fine job I am sure.  Anyhow I was able to go and visit with them a little later and had a great time.  We talked about some of the things we are doing and some of the things we would like to do more of.  They shared how much they love the place and also gave me a referral for someone I should talk to at North Elementary.  I had shared what we do with the parent training stuff at South and that we wanted to do more of these things with other schools. 

I realize that I am just kind of rambling on here.  The point that I am trying to get at is that we want to be a part of the community and not just a  part but a place that people love to come to, love to tell their friends about.  I don't know, just being a part, making a difference somehow. 

Let Him In

Natty is allowing me to share her poem on the blog.  I think she did a great job.  Thank you Natty Sue.  You are a wonderful daughter and a great help.

Let Him In
By Natalie Fontano

Jesus knocking on a door
The door has no handle
Let him in, let him in

He heals the hurt
He blesses the sick
Let him in, let him in

Jesus sends the Holy Ghost
To protect you
Let him in, let him in

Jesus knocking on a door
The door has no handle
Let him in, let him in


We were working on a few things last night and she decided to write this poem.  Oh, first she was looking for an easy out to an assignment but I wouldn't let her.  Really she was hoping to spend more time in a book she is reading but she finally got the idea that until she finished the assignment and took it seriously I wasn't going to let her.  When she told me she was done and handed me the paper I didn't know what to expect.  I read it and thought it was great.

I am grateful for Natty.  I am grateful for her testimony and her faith.  I am grateful for her sharing that and allowing me to record it here. 

Tired Buns

I was making dinner tonight and Jack came in to share some thoughts.  It was more about imaginary friends - train friends and others.  It was another one of those times where he just keeps going.  He goes and goes and goes and I pretty much have no idea what he is talking about.  Sorry pal, at some point in your life you might be reading this and I sadly have to admit to that.  It is simply exhausting trying to keep up with everything.  Somehow he does and I am sure that every word spoken makes perfect sense to him.  It certainly is an entertaining ride.  Sometimes I just need to be able to catch my breath. 

I did learn the purpose of video games tonight.  Yes I was informed that video games were invented to help people rest their buns from all that walking.  I did not know this.  Jack then told me that his buns have gotten way tired like that.  So there it is people, got tired buns?  Play a video game. 

Natty and I reviewed her Faith in God booklet today.  She had a couple of things to get done before we focus on the last section of the book.  One of the things she did was write a poem.  I thought she did a great job.  I would post it here but I did not get permission from her to do so.  Anyhow, we are on to the last part and she needs a refresher on some of the Articles of Faith that she has forgotten.  I think she is getting excited to go into Young Womens.  It will be really good for her.  She is a great girl. 

Quick Natty story.  We pulled into Church this morning and got out of the truck.  Natty came around and asked me if I could see her underwear.  Yep, plain as day.  Very nice stripes on those.  I sent the boys in and we ran home to fix the problem.  She was kind of surprised that they could be seen and we laughed about it.  Then we jumped out again after returning to church and the neon green undies were just as easy to see.  Only kidding, they were white and visible only in certain light.  We laughed. 

Ben Jackson and I chatted after Church.  He and his wife teach Andy in Primary.  He told me that Andy is doing great and shared a story in their lesson about hiking in Alasks and getting his foot stuck in hole.  Ben said he wasn't sure if it was true but with that age group you just kind of take their words for it.  I assured him that Andy did spend the summer in Alaska and the story was most likely true.  I asked Andy about it later and he shared his story with me too.  That a boy Andy. 

I'm going to have to find out from Jack what the purpose of  a computer is.  If it involves helping you rest your weary buns then hey, I'm in. 

AMEN girl ... You girl

Had a rather proud moment for myself today when I found a message on my email from Yahoo.  I was looking at some stories earlier today and found a piece about Romney.  It talked about class envy and I am certain it took him completely out of context and was likely a hatchet job by the reporter.  I don't know for certain but as there was only one brief line quoted that included the word envy in the story followed by a whole lot of opinion by the reporter, I'm fairly certain.  I scrolled down to some of the comments and they were all the same.  It was all about Romney being given everything that he has because of his rich father and how they have all had a much harder life and blah, blah, blah.  The whole thing kind of made me sick.  The mindset of people today is simply crazy - we are all apparently owed something.  Oh yes, I remember now, they did add something that Romney said about this being a country of merit and that we receive according to our labor.  Something like that anyway.  Regardless, people were spewing a lot of junk and I had enough.

I don't make comments on stories often.  In fact I can only remember one other time making a comment and it was after reading an article about divorce.  That however is another story.  Today I decided to say something.  I am going to pause and see if I can pull my exact comment so I don't have to try and rewrite it.  Sweet found it.  So here is my comment.

"I happen to think he is right. I went through a divorce, moved my kids across the country, have lost everything and finally started a business of my own. You better believe that it takes a lot of hard work and for me the rewards are just fine. Am I making millions - no, not even thousands. Is that my dream in life - no. If we continue to base our personal happiness on having everything someone else has or think that because we work hard we are owed what someone else has then it is envy and we are in for a long, hard, miserable life. If however we can find joy in what we do have, if we can be grateful for that 10 year old car that gets us where we need to go or that basic cell phone then life is going to be wonderful. If our self worth is based on how much money we have then we have missed the boat people."

Again, got this email updating me on my comment.  There were a couple of comments made and the first is my favorite.  Before I share it let me explain that my yahoo identity when I make a comment is Johannes.  It is my creative South African way of putting my name up there. I suppose it isn't that common here in the good old U S of A.  The comment from my fan Brenda:

"AMEN girl, you got the right idea. Hard work pays off in more ways than money. You girl have got a good outlook on life. Content and happy? I bet you are. Thank you, for being the person you are, need more like you."

Oh man, I had to laugh.  Obviously a majority of divorces don't end up with the father having custody of the children.  I can see that interpretation taking place.  Johannes - ?  Maybe Joanne.  I don't know.  Anywho, I have a fan in Brenda - we sisters are tight now.  Also noticed that I had 5 thumbs up when I pulled it up a moment ago.  Sweet.  Didn't see any thumb downs so my ego is really swelling right now. 

So tell me, is Johannes a bad choice on my part?  Will I always be seen as a women when I post a comment somewhere?  I guess I don't really care so long as I keep getting those AMEN girls. 

   

357 and Seven

I mentioned the other night that Andy went down the water slide at the pool for the first time.  We went again a couple nights later and he was all over it again - we made three trips and then the whistles blew and the pool was closed because someone had pooped in the pool.  Lovely.  Well we were back tonight and all about our water slide business.  51 stairs it took to get to the top of the of the slide.  Well, nothing could discourage Andy from making that trip.  In fact, we made the trip a total of seven times.  If my math is correct that puts us at 357.  He loved it - seven trips down the slide.

As I climbed those stairs tonight it took me back to the days when I had a pass to the Sandy Hydro tube.  I ran up the stairs there repeatedly when i would visit.  Andy had no quit in him either.  We would still be going had they not closed the pool for the day.   

A Little Tired

My recent posts have been a little sad.  Not a lot going on upstairs once I get the kids to bed.  I am just out of energy and when I sit down to write it usually ends up with me waking up some time later, realizing that quite some time has passed and I haven't gotten very far in my blog.  Perhaps I need to adjust a couple of things. 

Why so tired or the lack of energy?  Well, I don't know.  I am up early and running a few miles, then I am racing to get the boys ready for school, dropping them off and coming home to try and get a little house cleaning done or something accomplished before going to work.  Then I work and that is up on my feet all day kind of work.  Once I get home I am trying to feed kids, read with kids, listen to a lot of talk about trains and hot wheels and, well, trains and hot wheels.  Did I mention trains?  Jack has so much information in his head and so many ideas regarding trains that it can become a little exhausting just to try and keep up with him.  I suggested that maybe we can get a large board and start a model train set.  He put in my place pretty quickly and let me know we are not using a board, we will be building a garden train set on the ground.  So yes, train discussions, hot wheel discussions, other homework then we try and get over to the pool for a bit.  Once we get home it is scripture and prayer time then off to bed.  Oh, there are showers and other things in there as well.  Once I finally sit down I am spent. 

I used to be able to sit down with some sunflower seeds or a bag of popcorn, need I mention my favorite pistachios?  Anyway, those things would keep me awake for the most part.  With this diet those things are off limits.  When I pull up my blog I start to ponder a few things that I might write about and then... I eventually wake up. 

So hey, faithful readers of the blog out there.  Sorry for my lack of interesting content of late.  In actuality this is simply my journal and I suppose the exhausted blogs are merely a reflection on this period of time in my life.  I can say that I have a profound respect for single parents.  I did not realize how much work this takes.  Three years ago I began getting a feel for it and certainly understand it now.  It is hard and not just the endless schedule but the fact that with all you are doing you know inside that it isn't enough and there are things that are missing.  I don't know how to express that sadness I feel because of that.  It is very difficult and I guess that is when we turn to our faith in Jesus Christ and we trust that he will magnify our efforts and that somehow those things that are missed are made up for. 

So I am a little tired but I know in whom I trust.  I am grateful for promises made that my shoulders are blessed to bare the burdens that shall be placed thereon.  Those blessings are delivered in a variety of ways and I share that it is not my strength alone that keeps me going. To my savior I give thanks.  To my family and friends I give the same.  You are my sources of strength that lift me when I am down and give me courage to carry on.      

Freebie

This is just a brief note.  I am giving myself a free post on the day.  I don't have a strong topic in mind and I need to get to bed.  Tonight was the Chamber of Commerce dinner.  It was fun to go to and enjoyed it.  I mentioned before that we came in second to Sonnyboys for best new business.  They are great and happy for them.  We sponsored an award tonight and it was good.  It gave us some exposure for sure.  Hopefully it will capture some people who haven't seen us yet.  Anyway, it was a good time.  Okay, gotta check out.  Grateful to everyone.  Thanks for the freebie. 

If I Can Just...

This morning I found myself a little frustrated with the state of the house.  I have yet to take down Christmas decor, I know, pretty embarrassing.  Anyway, just struggling with things.  When I got home from taking Andy to school I started straightening some stuff and taking care of things.  There was so much to do as i really have not been focused on it.  I saw my un-made bed and said in my mind "if I can just get my bed made, I can feel better about things".  I did that and it is true.  Funny the difference a made bed can make. 

I have basically passed out at the computer tonight.  I had some other thoughts and things for this post but I am not thinking really well at the moment.  Time to go slide into that made bed and call it a day.
If I can just make it to my room...

Inflated

My kids often talk about how they would like me to be on the show Wipeout.  I would probably love the experience and might even be able to compete.  Whenever I think about it though I can see myself twisting an ankle, dropping to the ground and making a fool out of myself.  Actually I see that happening on the big inflated red balls - those things look like ankle killers to me.  I don't know if I could do it.  I have sensitive ankles.  Ankles people, not cancles.

So tonight we had a bit of a test.  We hit Funtime Inflatables in Cedar.  It was my first time, Rachel had bought passes for the kids that don't expire until the 21st of this month so we went to check it out.  The kids had a great time as did I.  Natty and I started running time trials on two of the inflatables.  Both had slides, one a long ladder and the other a little obstacle course, short ladder and slide.  It was fun to run through as fast as you could.  I nearly lost my sock on the first trial run and that caused some delay.  My next go was a much better time.  Natty was holding her own as well.  It was a good time.  It was also a great alternative to the jump house that would definitely mess up my ankles.  While on one of the inflatables there was a kid there who said to me "this is just like Wipeout!  He was the reason for my time trial idea and ignited a little Wipeout fire - very little fire, more of a spark or perhaps a pilot light at best.   

They had a pool table there and the kids wanted to learn how to play.  We went for it.  The problem is that I am not real good at pool.  Probably not the best teacher for this fine game.  Oh well, they have no clue that I stink at pool.  We were pretty bad and eventually they all lost interest.  Maybe next time they will be less excited about playing pool.  Sorry for my lack of skills at the pool table.

Anyhow, we had a fun time and we've had a good day. 

A Brave Boy

One of my favorite stories is that of President Eyring's father battling bone cancer and kneeling by his hospital bed.  This is just a quick synopsis and probably missing a lot of important detail.  In any case President Eyring talked to him about it and his father discussed something he had learned.  If memory serves he was asking Heavenly Father about the trial he was going through with cancer.  The impression he received was this:  "God needs brave sons and I must be brave".  I have thought about that a lot and I realize that I need to be braver in many areas of my life. 

Andy showed me what it means to be brave today.  We headed up to the pool for a Family Home Evening activity and had a great time there.  Andy decided he wanted to try the slide.  I had to go first and then be there for him in the pool.  It was fantastic.  We ended up going a few times.  Such a brave boy. 

  

The Chandalier

It looks like I am going to have to get started on my blog posts a little earlier.  Last nights post ended up going on tonight - well Sunday instead of Saturday and this one will definitely be on Monday as I am starting even later.  Oh well, I am probably the only one who even notices this timing issue and would even be worried about it.

It is very late and I am going to share just a quick story.

I was helping Natty with a project today.  I know, it was Sunday and we don't do homework on Sunday.  Well, it is Natty and she likes to put everything off to the very last minute and so I should not have been surprised when after church she tells me she has this project and needs a can.  Anyway, it is some sort of book in a can thing and she had to write a poem about the story, decorate a can and include things in the can - the poem for instance - that relate to the story.  She was telling me about the story and went on to discuss a chandelier.  I don't recall exactly why but she told Jack that he didn't even know what a chandelier was.  He replied that he did and then explained it perfectly.  Natty started to then correct him about many chandelier's having... Jack interrupted, a bit bored with it and said " I already know, crystals".  I started to laugh as did Natty who was a bit stunned.  Why does a 7 year old know this?  I don't know.  I thought it was funny and worth recording for all to see.

 

Wash, Dry, Fold, Repeat

Twas a fine day today.  We didn't do a lot outside of the house.  I took Jack over to the LBH because I needed to stop in for a bit.  I made him lunch and we had a fun time walking around the store together.  We walked back to one of the rooms where their are a lot of creative little signs.  One of the signs was done on four tiles and each tile had its own word.  They shared a message, the rules of laundry - Wash, Dry, Fold, Repeat.  There are times when these rules simply wear me out.  In reality laundry is quite easy to do sometimes it simply isn't convenient to wash, dry, fold, repeat. 

In other LBH news pops and Dave ran up to Salt Lake to pick up a grill and a few other things.  The grill is much larger then our current one and desperately needed.  A majority of our sandwiches are grill related and that ends up bottle necking us.  This new grill is huge in comparison.  It is at least 2.5 times as big and will allow us to move a lot more sandwiches.  That is a good thing.  It was quite a mess though and we spent some time working to clean it.  In the end it was a lot cleaner then it was but it still has quite a ways to go.  I did clean the grill itself and cooked a philly just break it in.  Seemed to work just fine.  Hopefully we can transition to that one pretty quick. 


Well, sure do love and appreciate the fam.  Natty is a huge help and I am grateful for it.  The boys are good little fellas as well.  I am grateful for my sweet children. 

A Classic

I had some laundry to fold tonight and a couple of kids that wanted to watch a movie.  It was late and I didn't really want to watch a movie but Natty pointed out that it was Friday and no school tomorrow.  My next challenge - what movie?  The kids don't really go for any of my choices so we end up looking at the movies they like and then they tend to argue a bit.  I didn't want to deal with any of that tonight so I simply grabbed one of my all time favorite movies.  Groundhog Day with Bill Murray.  I love that movie.  It has been a number of years since I last watched it and I was thoroughly enjoying it.  Jack was worn out as was Andy and so we shut it down and got in some scripture reading and family prayer prior to the kids retiring.  I will need to finish the movie tomorrow for sure. 

A number of years ago (I couldn't even say how many though it is likely prior to the Florida move in 2005) there was a story on TV about movies.  I just remember that the critics doing the story raved about the genius that is Groundhog Day.  It ranked as one of the best movies of all time - in their opinions of course.  I happen to agree.  It is just so well done and do I need to comment on Bill Murray?  The man is great.  I watched half of the movie with the kids and couldn't help but laugh - a lot - when I watched Bill do his thing and saw so many comparisons to Mike. 

Shortly after my mission when the fam moved to Vegas Mike got into watching What About Bob and Groundhog Day.  He may have watched other Bill Murray movies as well.  Anyway, he studied Bills mannerisms and adopted many of them himself.  He is a fantastic Bill Murray impersonator. 

The kids seemed to enjoy the movie though I don't know how well they were following what was going on.  Natty more then the boys I'm sure.  Well anyway, I enjoyed it.  It is a classic.   

The Elderly

Tonight I went on a date, blind date of sorts.  Amy basically arranged it with a girl from her ward that has come into the LBH a few times.  She is a really nice gal but I am feeling a bit old.  I am 12 years older then she is.  Wow.  I know that when you are older this is no big deal.  I however am only 38 and this feels a little weird. Should it?  Other than feeling old the date was good.  Had an enjoyable time.  I was a little out of my comfort zone not only for being elderly but also because I had to drive more of the conversation then I am used to.  I am usually the quiet one that listens a lot.  That was probably a healthy thing for me to do.  Anyway, good time.

So I went to pick up the kids from the folks house and found them watching their favorite Americas Funniest Home Videos.  They were enjoying it.  I get a kick out of watching their faces to see how they will react to certain things.  Jack really gets into it.  He gets very excited and laughs hysterically with this big grin on his face.   It is pretty funny and I end up finding a lot more joy out of watching my kids react. 

Of course when you are as old as I am it is the simple things like funny smiles on peoples faces that bring you lots of joy. 

Three Solid

On Monday I started my new years diet.  Yes one of the resolutions this year is to once again lose a little extra weight.  Anyway, the first two days were excellent - splurge days.  Eat as many calories as you possibly can.  Actually, I don't really care for those days.  It is difficult to continually pack in the food in search of thousands of calories.  You get sick of food very fast.  Today was day 3 overall but day one at 500 calories.  It went well though there were many a moment when I really wanted to have some cheese or maybe a little fudge.  It is okay though, mentally I am strong right now and that is good.  We are also having a little competition and whoever cheats has to put money into our swear jar.  I am fairly tight when it comes to money and that should assist in the motivation to stay true to the diet.  Anyway, three weeks at 500 calories.  It gets old quick.  I need to stay focused and on task.  After three solid I get to move to a maintenance period of three weeks at a 1000 calories per day.  Oh, that will be heaven. 

Can I just say that grilled chicken on a bed of lettuce with some onion, tomato, bell pepper and mushroom can be quite a tasty dish.  Can I also just say that in three weeks I will most likely never want to eat chicken again. 

Wingnuts

What is the definition of a wingman?  Is it someone that's got your... wing?  Perhaps someone that's got you covered.  I really don't know.  Today I had to contact a girl about a blind date and had no idea how to do it.  I turned to Dave and Amy for a little help on the matter.  I'll call them my wingnuts. 

So here's the deal Dave googles how to start a conversation with a girl/woman via text.  It comes back with a variety of suggestions.  Oh it had some cheesy questions to kick things off - none of which were used.  It did provide other insights and suggested that a man that texts rather then calls is a wimp.  That hit a little close to home.  I am much more comfortable texting then I am calling.  Can't help it.  I have a hard time speaking, feel like I am muttering.  I also have a hard time hearing clearly on the phone.  I can't even use the phone on my right ear - don't know why, I must have some sort of mental block. 

I don't really like to think that a texting man is a wimp as much as maybe he is shy.  Shy I am but is that all?  Probably not.  I'm sure it comes down to quite a bit more in my case.  Is it confidence?  That may just be the head of the nail that I need to hit.  No doubt in my mind that when it comes to ladies I lack confidence.  I remember being in the University Ward and Pete telling me that all these ladies were interested in me.  Nope, no way.  I don't see myself, never saw myself as any sort of ladies man.  I am far from tall, dark and handsome.  If the ladies dream man was more of the short, pudgy and pale variety...  Seriously though, I don't see myself bringing a lot to the table when it comes to certain things in life that society says are important.  In my own mind I see those things as what ladies want and I don't have it. 

Why do I feel this way?  Lets just say that certain things that have happened in my life over the last few years have contributed.  I bear scars emotionally and inside that contribute greatly to that lack of confidence and a feeling that what I have to give isn't good enough.  Oh goodness, that is hard to say, hard to admit but it is reality in my mind.  To put myself out there again when these fears exist inside is extremely difficult.  So yes, I am a little shy.  I guess I need to figure out how to get beyond these things. 

So be it that I am a wimp or that indeed I am shy it takes a bit of bravery to send the text or make the call.  Maybe this is where my wingnuts come in.  Sure they laugh at me and think it is funny but I know they are pulling for me.  Not only that but they give great pointers like "oh, I see we both have cell phones".  Have you ever heard such a great conversation starter?             

Random Pain

The other day I started having this random pain in my foot.  This would be my left foot and the pain is kind of in the middle of the foot behind my last three toes.  That probably allows for many interpretations so I won't worry about it.  Suffice to say I have foot pain. 

I do recall hurting this particular foot back before my mission.  In fact I think it was a few months after I graduated from high school so we are talking 20 years ago.  I was out in the street playing soccer in my bare feet and stepped on the curb wrong.  I just remember something cracking in my foot and then a lot of pain.  I didn't think much of it and just continued on with life enduring a little pain in my foot.  I remember after being in the mission field for a few months coming to the realization that the pain was gone.  That was a neat thing to realize.

So now the pain is back, just out of the blue.  Is this sudden appearance of pain a sign of age?  Is it a message that I am not too far away from 40?  Perhaps an arthritic foot?  Oh crap, I am getting older.  Pretty soon I'll have hair growing out of my ears and nostrils.  Maybe I already do and just don't know it.  As if the random foot pain wasn't enough when I got up this morning I had pain in my right leg.  I seriously don't know of anything I have done in recent days that would warrant the kind of sudden pain.  We will press on.  I can take it. 

So in other Random Pain moments I told the kids about the time I had to lay a bit of Random Pain on Moses the dog.  I role played the sudden attack for them and then told them how I fended him off with a few blows and then a shovel handle for good measure.  Jack thought it was hilarious and was very excited about it.  One of the neat things about telling Jack a story is that within a few minutes he has it pretty well memorized and he begins telling you the story usually with a "do you remember when' or ten.  It is great.

The Places You'll Go

I know, this is crazy, two blog posts in one night.  What am i getting at?  Well, I had a moment tonight with the kids as I read them a bedtime story.  Jack and Andy were in their bunks, Natty and I were sitting on the floor of their room.  I saw a classic book that has become perhaps my favorite children's book though I really don't know if we could classify it as a children's book.  I think it is simply a great book with an inspiring message that applies to everyone.  I don't know that I ever heard and certainly never read this book growing up.  My Dr. Seuss library consisted of Green Eggs and Ham and that was it.  I think the first time I read Oh, the Places You'll Go! was after we moved to Cedar and as I just mentioned, it has become one of my favorite books. 

I thought it would be a great little book to read as we kicked off this new year.  It was.  The kids loved it and we interacted throughout the book.  Each had questions about what different things meant and so we had a lot of discussion about it.  Do I dare admit that this particular story makes me cry?  I might be alone in this one but it does.  I get emotional as I read it and ponder the challenges of life.  I think about the path that my life has taken and the ups and the downs, the slumps, the loneliness, the being afraid and I can relate to the spirit of this book.  I love it because it captured so many of the things I have felt and I have struggled with and it constantly provides hope and encouragement to carry on.

Here is one of many passages in the book that I really could relate to:

All Alone!
Whether you like it or not, alone will be something you'll be quite a lot.
And when you're alone, there's a very good chance you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants.  There are some, down the road between hither and yon, that can scare you so much you so much you won't want to move on.  

But on you will go though the weather be foul.
On you will go though your enemies prowl.
On you will go though the Hakken-Kraks howl.  
Onward and up many a frightening creek.,
Though your arms may get sore and your sneakers may leak.

On and on you will hike.  And I know you'll hike far
and face up your problems whatever they are. 

Thank you Dr. Seuss for the encouragement and also for a book that really tells it like it is.  I enjoyed reading this tonight with the kids and discussing those times in our lives when we have challenges to face and just how important it is to carry on.  The press forward.  Naturally I discussed the strength that we receive through a loving Savior and how through him we can overcome any trial or obstacle that comes in our lives.

I record this because the moment was a real one tonight.  It was a neat little family bonding moment and I hope that it is one that the kids will ever remember. 

I guess I will close with another little spot from the book:

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself 
any direction you choose.

Labor to Perform

I had the assignment and opportunity to teach the lesson in Elders Quorum today.  As the only member of the Elders Quorum presidency attending today's meeting it was kind of by default.  Well, regardless, I was appreciative of the opportunity and have pondered the lesson and studied for it over the last few weeks.  Being the first Sunday of a new year I naturally thought of resolutions and goals but did not want to give that same lesson we tend to hear at this time of year.  Instead I wanted to focus on our spiritual selves and try to help each member take a look at where we are spiritually.  The last lesson I gave in this quorum was rather tough.  We were a brand new Ward, nobody knew each other and it was like pulling teeth to get participation.  Today's was different.  It went very well.  Participation from the brethren was excellent and the Spirit was strong.  I appreciated that and learned much.  It is great to feel that difference in the quorum as we have grown over the last few months. 

I started out the lesson by taking a look at the first 6 verses in Moroni chapter 9.  Mormon wrote a letter to his son Moroni and described the challenges he was facing in their battles and also with the people spiritually.  Satan had great hold on them and lead them to anger.  Mormon labored diligently to teach them and to preach repentance but they hardened their hearts against him.  As I read and pondered these verses I tried to compare it to our day and the struggles we face, the contention that exists in the world, and how caught up we can be in our daily lives.  It is easy to get so caught up in things that we forget the Lord.  I imagine that there was a lot for Mormon to get caught up in with the destruction taking place with his people.  I imagine that there were times of great discouragement.  I love his heart as he talks about the labor that they have to perform in verse 6.  As a holder of the Priesthood of God I have a labor to perform. No matter how hard life gets or how busy it may become that responsibility does not go away.  This became the central theme of the lesson - a labor to perform. 

As mentioned the goal I had for the lesson was to encourage each of us to look at ourselves spiritually.  We opened the Book of Mormon some more and reviewed Alma 5 and the spiritual self evaluation that Alma discusses as he begins his missionary labors to strengthen the Church.  I love this chapter and we focused our attention to verses 14 through 26.  I love where these verses go.  Alma doesn't play around.  I love the question in verse 26 where he discusses our feeling to sing the song of redeeming love and asks if we can feel so now.  As we take time to assess, honestly assess our lives and what we are doing how can we answer that question; can ye feel so now? 

Well, there was a lot discussed and I am not going to go any further into the lesson details.  I will say this, there were experiences shared, quotes shared, scriptures referenced and testimonies borne by the members of the quorum that I believe lifted each of us.  I know it lifted me and I am grateful for that.  I know of a few that were also lifted by the lesson.  I am thankful for the opportunity and love my time with the brethren. 

I am also grateful for the opportunity to reflect some on my own spiritual station in life.  I see where I've been and where I am now and I know where I want to go.  I also recognize that there are many things that I need to improve on and do better with.  We did discuss Helaman 5:12 in the lesson and the invitation from Helaman to his sons to build upon the foundation of the Savior, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall.  I shared my testimony to the brethren and do so now that I know the savior lives.  I know that he is our sure foundation.  He knows us personally, knows our needs and is aware of those things that we are going through.  In our times of greatest need he is there.  When we find ourselves in times of trial and turmoil we need to trust in the Savior and we need to remain firmly planted on that foundation.  He will not abandon us, all we need to do is trust in him and come unto him. 

As I think about where I am at spiritually and recognize the importance of doing the little things today.  These are things that will strengthen us and prepare us for times of trial and turmoil.  It is the oil for our lamps.  I think about how hard it is to hold family home evening, family scripture reading, family prayer and to get everyone to church.  Sometimes I simply scratch my head and wonder if it is even worth it.  I know that it is.  These basics of the gospel have been a tremendous source of strength in my life.  They have helped strengthen my testimony of the Savior and have enabled me to feel of his love for me.  I know that he lives and that he loves each of us.